I cannot stop thinking about what Harry said last night. He left me in the dark after saying something totally surreal. Nobody has ever said anything to me like that, and i am happy and excited that we finally kissed but what i'm waiting for is the big bang that may or may not happen in exactly 6 days.
Every minute feels like an hour. Harry had me intoxicated and i didn't even need to drink. I got drunk off of his touch which was enough for me.
.
Dear journal...
I havent talked to Sharon in a few days. I'm not stressing though, she will get over herself soon enough.
6 days journal... 6 days!! Could it actually happen?
Only time will tell.
.
It is now 6:30 in the morning. I have not gotten any sleep. I decide to get up and shower. I have been a mess lately with all this family shit.
I grab a towel and some new clothes and head to the bathroom. I turn on my speaker and put Five seconds of summer on shuffle.
"Throwing rocks at your broken window only you can care for my sickness. Raises yourselves up a middle finger cause they all think were twisted."
I look at the clock on my phone and i have 6 new messages.
Sam: ANNABELLE RAE WAKE UP NOW
Sam: NOW BJSAKLCSBJUCS
Sam: BRUH
Sam: DYING
Harry: Can I come over love?
my heart stops beating.
Is he hoping to continue our lessons? Because I have no problem with that, But hasn't he gotten enough of me in this past week? I have grown to assume I am quite the complainer, but that's only because my life is a fucking mess of emotions and secrets that are waiting to be spilled in the long run and i don't know if i am physically prepared for more hurt. I am at my end, without even realizing we passed the beginning.
Harry:Anna?
Anna: Sure.
Harry: Window again?
Anna: Dude you're going to have to come through the window every time lmao. Get used to it Styles.
Harry: Sounds good. See you in 5 xx
Anna: See you soon ;)
I put my phone down deciding to ignore The messages from Sam. Right now all i want to be focused on is Harry. Whether we are dating or not, I'm addicted to his touch. Each time his lips meet mine i reach an intoxicating state that is hard to come down from. You get used to it, so much that nothing is ever enough. That's what happened to me. I have a constant thirst for his lips and its unquenchable.
.
He knocks on my window and i wave my hand to let him in. He comes in and quietly shuts the window and sits next to me.
That flame is ignited again.
Shit.
"Hey stranger." He says and i smile at his thick british accent. Its adorable but strangely attractive.
"Hey."
"So.." he looks down and out of instinct i place my hand on his. He looks back up at me and raises a brow.
"What?"
"Nothing. Keep it there." He says and i oblige. I leave my hand there but he adjusts himself and is now facing directly in front of me. I feel like an animal stalking its prey and those green eyes, those are what i have my eye on. I will look inside of him and see what he's got hidden, or what makes him intoxicated.
"Anna?"
"Mhm?"
"So about those lessons..."
"Yeah?"
"Do you want me to..?"
"Sure." I say but i think we both know the answer i wanted to say was HELL YEAH DADDY but i never did. I am trying my best to keep my cool but i dont think i can any longer.
He scoots closer, only inches from me at this point.
"Harry" i breathe as he presses his lips to my neck, trailing soft kisses down my shaking skin.
My hands are tangled in his hair, and his lips find mine, moving in sync.
Am i in love with you, or am i in love with the feeling?
The question will remain in my head forever. Considering i dont know all that much about him but i will find out what has got him like this, so broken. Maybe i can be the thing that will fix him? He just has to let me in.
...
"Harry wake up." I say trying not to be loud. We fell asleep in my room.
"What?" He groans and runs his hands through his hair.
"We fell asleep. Do you want to go for breakfast?"
"Sure. Let me go to the bathroom first."
"Sounds good."
He goes into the bathroom and i grab a sweater from my closet before leaving just in case it gets cold out.
I decide on my camouflage sweater and we head out my window. This feels like the hundredth time I have seen him go in and out this window.. butnit has only been 3 times. And i need it to happen more.
"So where are we going?"
I shrug. There really isn't much around here but im sure we will find something if were that hungry.
"Here." He says and pulls into a small place and we get out of the car and walk up to the door. The drive here seemed short, only because i was daydreaming.
About my addiction.
Once i got a little taste I'm addicted to your fix, maybe this time 2 wrongs make it right.
Those lyrics will be stuck in my head all day now.
We get in and have a seat and wait for the waiter to come.
"What can i get you?" The waitor asks and i havent even looked up at his face yet. I grab my cup and take a sip than look up with the intentions of placing my order, but my water ends up all over the place.
"Jared?"
"Anna?"
Why did he come back from University and not tell me? Did he know all along? Or did he not go to University at all... all i know is i am getting answers.
.
______________________
HAIII PARTY PEOPLE
sorry it has been taking years for me to update we just moved into a new house!!
Anyways...
The songs for this chapter are. . .
Prisoner: the weekend/ Lana del ray
In the night: the weekend
Alphabet boy: Melanie Martinez
What a feeling: One direction
Mark my words: Justin bieber
Okay thats it for today well enjoy loves and see ya next time.
All the loveeeee
- Raina xx
