5SOS Blurbs

The Notebook Quote; Calum

The Notebook Quote; Calum

Five months.
It had been five months since Calum left for tour.

Of course you had known Calum was leaving months before he jumped on a plane to a new part of the world, but that didn't mean you were prepared for it. You weren't ready for the loneliness, the bed being cold, the quiet mornings, having to remember that you didn't need to set out an extra mug on the counter in the morning, you just weren't prepared for this and it had been getting harder everyday.

The daily phone calls turned into three calls a week, he didn't visit on his breaks as much as he used too. He rarely ever even texted you goodnight, even though that was a promise you had both made no matter what time it was for the other person. For five months you've been alone, worrying about the relationship between you and Calum. The tabloids blowing up with his face and sometimes new girls around him, those didn't bother you in the beginning because you had trusted him. But with the way things were going between the two of you, you figured anything was possible.

Calum was coming home tonight for a few days, and you were excited but a little uneasy with how it would go. You made yourself a cup of tea in hopes it would calm your nerves even though you were just pacing around the house, awaiting his arrival which was supposed to be shortly. You heard a car pull into the lane way, and shortly after you heard the front door opening. When you turned around to see the boy you loved dearly, you were in shock.

Calum stood there in the doorway, looking drained and annoyed. You knew that tonight wasn't going to be good for either of you, your excitement made you rush over and tackle him into a big hug but it felt like there was a brick wall between the two of you. His arms lazily wrapped around you, the comfort wasn't there like it used to be. "Hi" you breathed out, taking a step back as you tried to pull a smile. "Hi babe, I'm really tired I'm sorry" He mumbled. You knew it was a lie, Calum was never good at covering a lie. You sighed, grabbing one of his bags and taking it up to the bedroom without saying another word to him as he trailed behind you. As soon as you both reached the bedroom, Calum cleared his throat. "I uhm, I have some song writing to catch up on tonight.. I think I'll take the spare room so I don't keep you up" He said awkwardly, you looked at him with your eyebrows raised. "Calum I love listening to you write, it's nice" You breathed out and he sighed.

"Babe please." He said annoyed, you stood in shock. You thought to yourself for a moment thinking 'how dare he. After what he put me through for months, and now he thinks he's doing it here in my home' you scoffed, grabbing his bag and brushing his shoulder with yours as you passed him to go to the guest room. "Fine. Order dinner for yourself too" You groaned, pushing past him again before going downstairs. You could hear him following behind you, "Y/N I don't want to fight." he said, you rolled your eyes as you turned to look at him, "clearly" you muttered under your breath. He stood in the kitchen with you, grabbing a drink for himself. Your body language alone was enough to show him that you were pissed, and he started to take notice. "What's wrong with you? I'm home. You should be happy" he mumbled, setting his drink down on the counter.

You laughed, "I was happy, I've been counting down the days for you to come home and for once you actually stuck to your word! My god!" You said, your voice laced with sarcasm and annoyance. "You've hardly spoken to me since you left, you never visit. Hell you don't even ask me if id like to fly out for a few days! I never know what you're doing, I'm completely out of the loop. Do you know how shitty it is to have to follow a fûcking update account just to know about MY boyfriend? MY 2 years long relationship?!" You said, mindlessly tidying up the kitchen counter. Calum stayed quiet, still standing by the other end of the kitchen.

"It's so hard Calum. Fuck it's so hard to just sit here and go about my day not even hearing from you, I don't know what to do anymore. My family asks about you and I don't know what to say, everyone thinks we've broken up! I don't know what this even is anymore Calum!" you were shouting by now, Calum walked over to you. Standing only a few feet away,

"What do you want y/n?" He asked, his question made you laugh bitterly. "Just tell me what you want! Stop thinking of what everyone else is saying or doing just think about you for a second and tell me what it is that you want out of this!" He shouted.

"I want you!" You screamed. "I want you, I want you so bad but" You stopped mid sentence as he looked at you in the eyes. "But I don't want this, this isn't what we promised each other. Calum I love you, more than I've ever loved anybody else but that doesn't give you the right to treat me like shit! You run off of bullshit excuses. My love is running out, and my patience is running thin. So either you love me or you let me go because I can't do this by myself."  You were crying now, and so was Calum. You both stood in an eerie silence, unsure of where this would lead.

"I'm so sorry." Calum breathed out, "I'm so sorry I've been such a shit boyfriend, I'm sorry I pulled away from you everytime you were reaching out." He sobbed, you moved your arm to grab a hold of his but he moved away. "And I'm so sorry that I can't even promise you that it'll change." He choked out, moving away from you slowly. You couldn't believe what was happening right now, "No. You're not playing this bullshit card Calum. You are not walking away from me this time, you are going to sit here and tell me what the fuck is wrong with you and we're going to make this work because you're not throwing two years away because of one mistake that can be fixed" You said seriously, he stood in shock. Calum knew all too well that you were telling the truth and that there was no sense in running away from the problem.

"Okay. You're right. Okay we'll do this. We'll make this work. I love you, I love you so much y/n and I don't want to fuck this up again" He breathed out.

A/N please don't be quiet readers if you're even reading these, I love comments they make me happy.