Flying High

CHAPTER 14

 I walked towards Marc who waved when he saw me enter so I took a deep breath as I approached it would be better to be stuck in an arena where you kill for the entertainment of others. But now I felt like a victim that was being slowly killed and there was a crowd screaming to finish me off. I sat down across Marc and he smiled.

" Hey" I smiled and I took off my jacket.

" You changed" he said looking at my short hair.

" Yeah, I needed one" I smiled and he smiled.

" So how is it going?" I asked, it can't get more awkward but he nodded.

" Good, were you with that guy" he said referring to Dylan who he had met but didn't know that he was the guy, I nodded while looking at my nails and I took deep breaths.

" How was it?" he asked and I sighed looking at him.

" Like heaven was on earth" I started.

" As if it was a lie, a dream" I corrected myself since it was a lie.

" Sweet nothings, promises. If I could stop time I would have stopped it a week ago" I said and soon a waitress brought me coffee and I wrapped my cold fingers on the warm mug.

" Been there done that, I know how you feel" he said looking at his at his own cup, too.

" But the only difference is that you sound depressed" he pushed me and I didn't object.

" Like I said, a lie, so I had to pretend that nothing happened when I ate dinner with him and his girlfriend and it broke my heart seeing them kiss full of love" I said I wasn't looking at the cup but the table replaying those moments. My own brain was punishing me as if it was like, you're a complete fool for believing that we would ever love you the way he loved her. I felt my eyes become extra watery so I looked up blinking really fact no one had to see me cry.

We kept talking, well, I kept talking since he thought it was good for me to talk about it, moreover he didn't bring me back to reality by snapping his fingers in front of my eyes or wave his hands he just let my mind wander as I talked from time to time.

" I used the subway to get here, do you want me to drive you home" that was the only time he pulled me back to reality and I nodded, I wasn't in the right state of mind to drive.

" He left the day after, I don't know where he went" I said answering his question and I looked outside and I thought how my own brain loathes me.

" I guess this is your house?" he stopped right in front of Dylan's house but I just shook my head and pointed to the house next to it, I didn't feel like moving or talking. Actually I didn't feel like doing anything in general I just wanted to lie down and listen to depressing songs all day long.

 Marc had to pull me out since I was the one with the keys and I refused to even move a single muscle. I walked unwillingly to the door and I opened it letting Marc get it first and I followed trying not to fall down and crawl to the couch.

" What about you?" I asked and he sighed the same way I did.

" Why are we so caught up loving people who are committed to someone else and we will be nothing but just a mere fun, whereas to us they are the entire world" he started.

" Do you think we did something in our past life?" I shook my head sitting up and I explained my theory of why I don't want to believe in them.

" And if I ever accept them it will be utter defeat on my part because at the same time I will be accepting my love for Dylan, I can't do that because if I do it, this will be my happy" I said pointing to my face but I lied back again telling him to continue.