Our Little Secret (h.s.) // editing

Seven

The sun was shining through the window, directly on my face causing me to stir awake. Without thinking, my hand mindlessly searches for the familiar warm body next to me, only to discover a cold patch. I couldn't help but feel a little disappointed, but I try to remember it's better that she didn't stay with me. It's better for me, for my feelings if she left. You're a great friend, Harry. Her words keep replaying in my head as a reminder that there is no chance for me. I have no idea why her words are hitting me so hard. In all honesty, it's beginning to frighten even myself.

I guess all along , I kind of already knew that we would always be just friends. But there was always that little bit of hope that we could be more. How stupid of me. Part of me doesn't want to see her, speak to her, or even think about her, yet, the other half of me wants nothing more. Half of me wants to show up at her door with flowers, chocolate, and give her the world.

A loud crash sounded from downstairs, causing me to snap my head to find Jess missing from my bed. I throw the blanket off of me, and race downstairs. His small body is all covered in flour, two eggs in his hands, the rest of them splattered on the floor. As soon as his eyes met mine, fear flashed through them, his feet carrying him backwards as I stepped forward. A laugh fell from my lips as I took in the image in front of me.

"What happened, bud?" I laugh, bending down to start cleaning up the eggs. The entire carton fell on the floor, and all the eggs spoiled. Looking up, his eyes met mine once more, causing me to stand, and place his small body on top of the counter. "Are you okay?"

"I just got hungry, and I wanted to make us food." Jess dropped his head to look down at the splattered egg all over his cloths. His eyes graze up to my chest, concentrating on the Swallows. He laughs, then pokes all the tattoo he could see. "What are those?" He questions, while he rubs his hand to try and remove the permanent ink from my skin.

"They're tattoos. They don't come off, bud." His eyes widen as if in horror. His hand quickly retracts, and he places it on his lap as he looks around my body to see all the other ones.

"Did they hurt? Why did you get so many? How do they do it? What if-"

"Listen, help me clean up the kitchen, then I will let you watch me get another one. Deal?" I offer. He smiles, and claps his hands together. I know it's stupid to go get yet another tattoo just to show him how they do it, but honestly, I don't really feel normal today. What Janissa said last night hit me a bit harder than I expected it to. I thought she would just say that she has feelings for me as well, but that obviously didn't happen.

By the time we ended up finishing the kitchen, and cleaning ourselves, it was about one in the afternoon. Huh, I guess it was messier than I though it was. We got in the car, and pulled up to the local tattoo and piercing parlor. Jess held my hand tightly as the vision of large men with tattoo everywhere overwhelmed him. I tell them man i'm here for another tat, but he's seen me plenty of times to know why I'm here. Jess follows me to the stand where all the designs are, and I tell him to help me pick one out.

At first he points out what looks to be a fish, but I laugh and list a few reasons i'm not getting that tattooed. We both end up pointing out the same design. Three nails. He looks up at me and smiles.

"Where should I put it?" I laugh. He pretends to think, then points to my arm, right next to my ship. I nod, and tell the man where I want it. He guides me into a room, and prepares the needles. Removing my shirt, I lay down on the table, and tell Jess to take a seat at the end of the table. His face immediately drops, and I am unaware why. He kicks his feet over the edge of the chair, and continues to look down. "Actually, bud. I'm kind of scared. Will you hold my hand?" His face lights up instantly, and rushes over to my side. Holding out my hand for him to take, he looks up at the man.