Our Little Secret (h.s.) // editing

"I Have A Plan."

(Sorry guys, this is kind of a filler..... )

~Harry~

We stubble in the door around three in the morning. Janissa was carrying some of the bags as I carry Jess to his bedroom. Walking upstairs, the thoughts that were running through my head were making me dizzy. I want to tell her, I don't want to tell her. I'm confused, and it might ruin my relationship with not only my girlfriend, but my best friend.

"You're terrible at this relationship thing, Haz." Jess mumbled into my neck causing me to smile.

"Go back to sleep, bud." I whisper.

Jess nods his head before dozing back off to sleep. I cover him with the duvet, and walk to my room. Janissa is sitting in the small rocking chair by the window, her eyes looking at the darkness. There was something bothering her, and I could tell. She was playing with her hands in her lap like she always does when she is nervous.

"What's on your mind?" The words leave my mouth before I was able to stop them. She doesn't want to talk to you, Harry. Why can't you accept that?

"Just something Chloe said earlier." 

Chloe just seems to always find her way back into my life. I won't let her this time. I won't let her break me and Janissa up. Janissa means more to me than she knows. I am in love with her, I have been for a while, but I can't tell her that. Not with everything going on around us. Or maybe I should tell her and all of this fighting would have been for nothing. Maybe that's what she needs to hear. Maybe that's what I need to say.

"Which was?" I question, kneeling down in front of her. Her brown eyes meet mine. "What do you need me to do? I'll do it Janissa. Whatever you want, i'll do." 

She smiles at me, placing a soft kiss on my cheek.

"Chloe said I should have you tested."

Of course she did.

"Is that what you want?"

Yes. Why else would she bring that up. If I was in her position, I would too. She doesn't know the number of people i've slept with, not to mention the number they have slept with. Although, I always used protection when I slept with them, but she doesn't know that.

"I just think it would be a good idea, you know, before things between us get... serious." Her voice is small. She bows her head in embarrassment. She has nothing to be embarrassed about. Wait, did that mean she planned on doing things with me. Is this her way of asking me to touch her?

"Yeah. I understand."

Her cheeks turn to a deep shade of red.

"There's no need to be embarrassed, beautiful. I'd want me tested to." I smile in hopes of lightenting the mood.

"That doesn't help, Harry." She moves to the bed, and I follow like the lovesick pushover I am at this moment. No shame to my title. "Just tell me one thing..."

"Anything."

I'm not ready to fight with her again. I can't stomach the fact that she's mad at me. All of this fighting on top of losing my mother is really starting to hit me.

"If the positions were switched, and you were me. If I told you everything I had done, would you leave me?" Her question took me a minute to process. If I were her, and she had done all the things I had, would I leave her. The answer was simple, and took no thought.

"Yes." I reply.

Her eyes dropped from mine, causing me to frown and take hold of her small hands. I had no idea what to say. I answered the question, and she was now silent. My lips connected with her cheek, as I removed myself from the bed. I grabbed a shirt, and pair of boxers for her to sleep in. But when I handed them to her, she shook her head.

"I think i'm going to head home."

"Janissa, it's three in the morning. I don't want you driving this late. Just stay the night, i'll sleep on the couch and we can talk about this in the mor-"

"No, Harry." She cut me off. "I don't care what you want at this point. I have work tomorrow, i'll pick Jess up, but I just want to be alone right now." Her words hurt me more than I thought they had. She wanted to be alone. She wanted to get away from me.

"Can you call me when you're home?" Dropping the cloths on the bed, I walk her to the front door. "Please?" She nods her head, and gets into her car. No kiss, no hug, nothing. I watched her pull out of the driveway, and onto the main road.

I had driven the only girl I had actually really loved. I thought I loved Chloe, but I didn't know what love was until Janissa. Love is not robbing corner store because she likes bad boys. Love is supposed to make you a better person. Love is supposed to consume you, but this love was a back and forth between me and myself.

On one hand I know I lover her, and would do anything for her. Love is supposed to take you to cloud nine, and that's exactly what she does to me. She brings me up, and I never want her to drop me.

But on the other hand, I am way to fucked up for her to even imagine. I've fucked to many for her to count. To the point she wants me tested for STD's. How is someone supposed to react when their girlfriend asks them to get tested for that shit.

I'm obviously not going to tell her no, then she will think I have something to hide, which I don't. I would do anything for her. Literally.

I make my way upstairs, walking passed my room, and into Jess's. He stirs as soon as I open the door. Walking in, I stop at the side of his bed.

"Haz? What are you doing in here?" Sleep still in his voice. The cuts on his face were more eminent in the light, but they were still visible. I can't believe that kids were this cruel. His lip seemed to heal, but his eyes was still pretty bad.

"Move over." I whisper.

He did as I asked. I crawl in next to him, cuddling him in my arms.

"I miss her, Jess. I don't know what to do." I whisper into his hair. This little fucker always knows what to do.

"I have a plan." He smiles.

Like father, like son.

(Also, I just wanted to know opinions. Me and my cousin have to completely different likings. Fluff or Smut? Which do you like better?)