Our Little Secret (h.s.) // editing

Nine

(Okay guys, so I was thinking about everything going on in this book, and we don't really know what's going on with Jess, so here yah go. Also, best detailed comments gets a dedication??!!?? Also, this is in Jess's POV, and he is 9, so bare with his.... CHILDISHNESS)

Jess's POV

Miss Janissa told me to lock myself in the room, so that's exactly what I did. I'm sitting in the corner of my freshly painted room. Everything was going so happy today. Me and Haz painted my room, and I now have a small, blue racecar bed.

Haz is throwing things around, and I can hear all the crashing, a breaking. Then, it went silent. I grab Mr. Snuggles and return to the corner. It always got quiet before he would come up here. Before he stormed into my room. All I can remember is Haz getting off of the phone and falling to his knees. He started crying, then he started breaking stuff. He's never scared me like this. I don't want to be scared of Harry. I've been scared of to many people.

"Jess?" Haz called.

"Jess? Where the hell is that boy?" I could see the shadow of his footsteps outside of my door. His boots clicked heavy against the wooden floor. He would knock on the door a few times, before he kicked it in. "Why didn't you answer me!" He shouted.

"You're scaring me..." I whispered. I whispered against my monkey. His big shadow figure walked towards me. He leaned down to my eye level.

"When I call for you, you fucking answer! Got it!" He shouted in my face. The smell of his breath was stinky, and he was really close to me. My eyes find the floor, and it's not long before he grabs my face, and makes me look at him. "Fucking look at me when I am talking to you!" He shouts causing tears to fall from my eyes.

"Jess? Can I come in, bud?"

He lifts me by my shirt, throwing me on the bed. His cold hands touch my tummy under my shirt.

"Harry!" I scream. Why won't he help me. Why won't anyone help me. He takes my monkey and throws him across the room. I try to reach for him, but he pushes me back onto the bed, he rips my shirt. "Harry!"

"Shut the fuck up!" He screams at me. I quickly closed my eyes not wanting to see what he was going to do to me. He was much bigger, and I had no chance in fighting back. I knew I wouldn't be able to get away from him. Every time he tried this, I have some how been able to hid under the bed before he came in the room, or in the closet. But by now, he know every spot to look for me. He's found me a couple of times, only making me more scared.

My shirt was now ripped, and on the floor. It was my favorite shirt, and he knew that. it was white with three small, blue racecars on it. In big black letters on the top, it said 'They Call Me Speedy'. You know, like lighting McQueen, only he was red.

The feeling of his larger body on top of mine frightened me. He was large, which made it hard for me to breath. So, I just didn't. I didn't breathe. His blonde hair fell into his face, before he removed his hand from me to wipe it away. When he was like this, he would make my do icky things. Some times he would want me to touch his private, and when I didn't, I wouldn't eat. I learned really quickly.

A hand is placed on my shoulder, causing me to flinch back.

Janissa's POV

Harry and I's embraced is interrupted when we hear screaming coming from upstairs. He quickly stands up and runs upstairs into Jess's room. We find him in the corner, crying uncontrollably. Harry lowers himself to Jess's level, but Jess cowers further into the corner. Every time Harry would attempt to try and calm the small boy, he would just burst into more, and more tears. When Jess finally looked up, his eyes shot open, and stared at Harry.

No one said anything. When Harry told me about Jess being distant, or afraid, I hadn't really registered all of the terrible things that could have happened to him. I mean, he was small, and kind of scrawny. He doesn't look like the type of kid that would defend himself. Or could, at that.

Soon enough, the small boy was wrapped up in Harry's arms. The way he held Harry, and cried into him broke my heart. He look completely terrified.

"Don't let him hurt me, Harry!" He cried into Harry. Jess's eyes were screwed closed tightly. Harry glanced back at me, but I assured him I had no idea what he meant.

"I remembered the yelling," He whispered. "The things breaking... I don't want to remember!" That's all Jess said for about an hour before he cried himself to sleep in Harry's arms. He was going to put him in bed, before I reminded him he needed to clean Jess's ears. His face was confused, when I pointed to the small diamonds in his ears.

"Next time you let him pierce something, remember you will have to clean it." I smirk.

Harry walked him to his bed, placing his small body under the duvet, then exiting the room. I follow him down the hall as he took a seat on the edge of his bed. Guiding myself into his bathroom, I grab a cotton swab, and the bottle of alcohol, and walk towards him. He opens his legs, and allows me to stand in between them. Pouring a little alcohol on the swab, I position Harry's lip up to me. Before lowering myself to place a soft kiss on his lips, I clean his new piece of jewelry.

"What just happened in there?" He whispered to me, running a hand through his hair. The sting of the cleaner caused Harry to hiss, but he didn't move. I whispered my apologies, placing a soft, lingering kiss on his cheek. I know I have been honest and open about my feelings, and what I want between us, but other than that little thing that happened downstairs, Harry has been a little closed off.

"I told you he called me scared..." I trailed off. Harry's eyes shot daggers as to tell be that's not what he meant. "But, i'm not sure what he remembered." I place the bottle on the dresser, and take a seat next to him.

"I don't want him to be afraid of me..." I placed my hand on his to try to keep him from shaking. He immediately laced his finger with mine. The feeling of being able to calm him with my touch felt amazing.

"Then don't give him a reason to..." He would do this when we were younger. Push people away, but he was able to accept the fact that some people actually cared about him. I just don't want him falling into that again. He has me, Jess, all of the kids at the daycare love him. How can you not love Harry?

He nodded his head, then ruffled up his hair again.

"Where does this leave us?" His eyes met mine. The emotion in them worried, and hurt. I didn't say anything, watching the worry in his eyes increase.

"That's up to you, Haz." I whispered, kissing his cheek, and removing myself from him. Almost out the door, I felt a hand wrap around my wrist, pulling me back into him. I was met with the pair of warm, soft lips I've been craving.

"I want you."