Karma ||H.S||

Chapter 41

I know the visions that flash through my mind only lasts a few moments, but it feels like they go on forever. My head pounds as hard as my heart with a synced pulse and I have to sit down as it happens all too quickly, feeling nauseous with every memory I seem to gain back.

"Hey Paisley," Jenny whispers, looking towards the doors of the library, which makes me automatically look in that direction to see what's caught her attention.

I look back at her confused, realizing that she is looking at Harold walk in, and wondering why, knowing she usually doesn't give nerds a second glance. When I look back at him, he's looking at me nervously through his big black framed glasses, as he rummages through his backpack, but looks away quickly when he notices I'm looking at him, which happens every time my eyes happen to fall upon him.

"I have the perfect dare for you." She now has an evil smirk on her face and I feel myself sink. I was happy to not have been dared to do much over the last little while and I can just imagine what she's thinking right now. "I dare you to date Harold for a month."

"What?" I say, louder than intended. "No way, Jenny!"

"That kid has had his eye on you since grade 9," she informs me, as if I didn't know already. "He'll love to date the popular girl—and it's only a month. It won't be that hard for you."

"I'm not doing a dare that's going to hurt someone in the process," I whisper yell. "He's probably a nice guy. No."

"A dare is a dare, Paisley, you know that."

I can sense that Harry is staring at me from the opposite side of the table as he sits back down across from me. I'm hunched over with my head in my hands, unable to fully come back to reality. The memories play in my mind like a movie projected on a screen before me. The scenes switching from one to the next faster than I want them to. 

I remember everything like it all just happened yesterday. I could feel how he pulled me in with his wit and his charm. How easy it was to be myself with him. He was comfortable to be with, even from the very beginning and I let him in quickly, even more so than everyone else I knew in my life.

I've been standing on the beach for what feels like forever, allowing the wind to blow through my hair as I breathe in the fresh air, contemplating everything that's been happening over the last six days. Harold has changed everything already in such a short amount of time. We've spent all our time together since our first date, because as weird as it is, we click very well, and surprisingly, I'm finding myself loving every second that I'm with him. It hurts to know that this all started with a dare, and I can't do this to him. I know that I need to tell him the truth before this gets out of hand.

"Why did you ask me to come here?" Harold asks, when I don't say anything even though I know he's now standing next to me.

I finally allow myself to look over at him. His hair has so much gel in it, the wind doesn't even move it. He's looking at me seriously, understanding there might be something wrong, because it's not normal that I'm silent around him. "Do you ever wish things were different?" I ask.

His head tilts to the side, clearly confused.

"Life. Ya know," I continue. "I wish things were different. We surround ourselves with people who are fake and lie and you have to pretend that everything's alright when it isn't."

He laughs. He laughs during a moment I'm being very serious and I can't help but smile at him as he does this. "You're asking a nerd if he wishes things were different. I don't even think you'd ever understand."