AN: oh my god 7k reads what the hell thank you so much!!!! So, I'm going to try to write a songfic and please let me know what you think!! And there is no demigod-ness.
PLEASE READ:Also, Percy had depression in this story so there may be mentions of self harm and suicide, non of which happen. If any of this triggers you PLEASE don't read. Also, it's kind of just a Percy fic, as if Annabeth didn't exist or he'd never met her and he's dealing with this on his own and it's a plea for help which is what I grasp of the song itself. I don't own any of the lyrics. They are owned by Bring Me The Horizon
What doesn't kill you, makes you wish you dead. I got a hole in my soul growing deeper and deeper.
Percy was finding it hard. Hard to find the will to live. Depression they called it. It didn't make it any easier now it has a name. If anything it made it worse. The thoughts, the constant temptation to hurt himself or die, circled around his head getting more and more tempting.
And I can't take one more moment of this silence the loneliness is haunting me. And the weight of the world's getting harder to hold up.
He was lonely, and has no one to turn to. The sadness and emptiness bore down on his shoulders and with each breath the weight got heavier.
It comes in waves, I close my eyes, hold my breath and let it bury me.
Sometimes it got to much. Percy let everything consume him until there wasn't anything left. He remained empty and unfeeling. As if something had physically removed anything positive from his life and left him to deal with everything else.
I'm not okay and it's not alright won't you drag the lake and bring me home again.
Percy couldn't even remember the last time he smiled. It seemed like an eternity. Whenever he looked into a mirror he didn't see a human - just a shell of a former one. A boy who used to smile and take the latter. Now, his skin was pale and taught, as if he hadn't been eating. His eyes were green; once full of life, they now showed the broken soul inside.
Who will fix me now? Dive in when I'm down? Save me from myself.
He needed someone, to anchor him. Stop him drifting and doing something he'll regret. The constant thought of cutting or suicide drove him crazy. He couldn't do it. Sure, it was an option - but it was a last resort. He needed a saviour even if it was himself, he'd wait for an eternity if he had to.
Don't let me drown.
He was sinking, being weighed down by tears and depression it was getting harder and harder to escape his demons - they knew how to swim.
Who will make me fight? Drag me out alive? Save me from myself.
He needed a promise. A promise that he would make. Promising to be strong. It would get better. He knew it. But he knows that he can't do it on his own. Asking for help was the hard part.
Don't let me drown
AN: if anyone has depression or feels upset, please talk to someone, it may be hard but things can and will get better. I love you all, stay strong - abi
