Never Thought It Would Be You (Niall Horan Fanfic)

Chapter 50

Chapter 50

"It's so good to see you again" Sydnee smiled as we sat across from each other at Starbucks.
I swallowed my coffee before speaking, "yeah, it's been forever"
"I know" she agreed, "you look so much older"
I giggled, "well, it has been four years"
"That's amazing, four years without seeing each other. How did that even happen?" she paused, "We used to not even live through a day without talking"
I set down my coffee, thinking for a second, a feeling rising in my stomach, "that's really sad..."
She nodded sadly, "I missed you, you were my best friend"
"I missed you too" I answered, "I miss our friendship"
"Same"
There was a short silence as we dived into our thoughts.

She's right; we used to be so close, she was like my other half. She was such a big part of my life, but now, we haven't even seen each other for four years. It's been so miraculously long and it's unbelievable. I missed my best friend so much.
"Ashley apologizes that she can't make it" she said, "she's at work"
"Hardworking like usual" I laugh.
"Yeah, classic Ash"
"So, how is everyone else?" I weakly smiled.
"They're ok" she answered, "they're across the road at the bar right now actually"
"Really?"
"Yeah, do you want to see them?"
I smiled widely, "yeah, that would be great"

We stood up, taking the last few sips of our coffee before leaving. We exited Starbucks and crossed the road. My heart raced as we entered through the bar doors.

Niall, I'm going to finally see Niall. I'm not saying I'm not excited to see the other boys too, but he was the first name to spring into mind. I miss that boy and I would do anything to see him. My heart is pounding out of my chest and butterflies lurched in my stomach.

"AYE!" a familiar voice shouted, except a bit deeper, "LOOK WHO IT IS!"
I laughed, "hi Louis" I hugged him.
"How are you?" he asked.
"I'm good, how are you?"
"I'm good" he answered before turning around and shouting behind him, "OI GUYS!"
Three boys turned around, noticing me before charging me down with a group hug.
"Guys, guys!" I laughed.
"Tabby!" Zayn cheered as the boys chuckled.
"How are you? Anything new?" I questioned.
"It's been four years! Of course there's heaps new!" Liam shouted.
"HARRY AND SYD ARE GETTING MARRIED!" Louis yelled before the the boys cheered and poked Harry as he went bright red.
I gasped, turning towards Sydnee, "WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?"
She laughed, cheeks reddening, "I was going to tell you tonight at dinner wh-"
"Ask her now!!" Liam said as the other boys nodded.
Sydnee hesitated for a minute before sighing and looking down at the ground, "would you, umm, maybe like to, umm, be my bride's maid?" she almost whispered.
It took me a few seconds to consume the information, but as soon as I did, I almost jumped and screamed in joy.
"ARE YOU SERIOUS?" I squealed, hugging her.
She giggled, "yeah, so what's the answer?"
"THE ANSWER IS YES!" I screamed.
She smiled, "fantabulous"
I hugged her tighter before hugging the rest of the boys.
I paused for a minute, my smiled fading a bit as I realized something.
"Where's Niall?" I asked, hoping not to sound rude.
Zayn and Liam exchange a look.
"Uh, he, umm, he doesn't hang out with us anymore" Sydnee spoke quietly.
"What do you mean?"
"We haven't talked to him for three years" Zayn answered.
I didn't say anything, trying to take in the information.
"He got quieter after you left, he didn't seem happy. He kept more to himself and gradually stopped speaking to us. We tried talking to him, but he just doesn't seem like he used to be..." Zayn continued.
"I really think your departure changed him" Louis added in.
Everyone was quiet as I stood still. I didn't say anything, but the sound of my heart cracking was almost loud enough to fill the silence.
Sydnee hugged me tightly as the other boys sighed and gave each other looks of sympathy.
"You wanted to see him, didn't you?" Sydnee asked, the obvious question.
"Yeah, I did" I almost whispered.
"Did you end up telling him the truth?" Liam asked.
I bit my lips, looking down as I shook my head.

I could feel the guilt rising in my stomach. I knew I hurt Niall, but I didn't know I effected him this much. Our friends are our lives, they are the core of our spirits. It would've been terrible for him if he stopped talking to them. It hurt me to know how much pain he was in. I love that boy, why do I hurt him?

"You still can see him" Harry said, breaking the silence.
I looked at him, questioning what he said.
"We have his address, we can give it to you" he continued.
I smiled, "yeah, that would be great"
Harry nodded as Sydnee pulled out a pen and a piece of paper from her bag. He clicked the pen before scribbling over the sheet. He smiled as he handed it to me. I glanced down at it, reading the address before smiling and hugging him tightly.
"Thank you Harry" I whisper before hugging the rest of them. "I'll call you guys later, I'm sorry that I have to leave like this, but this is something I have to get done"
"We understand" Liam nodded.
"Good luck Tab" Louis added.
"Thanks" I weakly smiled before heading out of the bar and pulling over a cab.


"Thank you" I said to the driver, climbing out as he gave me my change.
The cab drove off and I turned around, inhaling a deep breath and closing my eyes. I relaxed my stiff muscles and regained my vision. I looked at the sign above the doorway of a high rise, reading the same name as the one written on the piece of paper. I entered trough the glass doors, making my way towards the elevators. I pressed the up button and waited before the doors opened. I stepped in and pushed the level in which Niall lived on.

What if he's not there? What if he hates me? What if he doesn't even want to talk to me? What if he's got a new girlfriend? What if it'll never work? 'What if, what if, what if' was circling in my mind.

I miss that boy and I don't even know what in going to say to him. I can't just say 'I'm sorry for ditching you for four years without a reason and come back out of nowhere, hoping you'd take me back'. No! I can't do that! What am I going to say? There's so much to say, but it's so hard to put it. I just love him, but I can't say that because from what my actions show, it seems like the complete opposite. Where do I even start? I miss him and still love him with all my heart. I'm scared and nervous, but this is something I should've done a long time ago. I have to do this, despite the outcome.

My fist hovered over the door of Niall's apartment. I drew in a few deep breaths before knocking the wood softly and stepping back, awaiting an answer. I heard a bit of stumbling inside before the door squeaked open, revealing the very boy I crave for each night, wishing he was beside me.

My heart wrenched as I scanned him. His hair was messy as if it hadn't been brushed out for months. Blonde spikes grew on his chin in consequence of not shaving for weeks. He wore a grey jacket, matching his track pants. His eyes were dull, as if it was staring into mid air, and a smile didn't appear on his face like it used to.
"Niall" I whispered, mainly to myself.
He looked me up and down, having trouble recognizing who i was before stepping back in realization.

He didn't say anything, neither did I. We stood in silence as our eyes drifted, taking in the differences that the years have laid on us. I took a step forward, wrapping my arms around his neck and hugging him as tight as I could, while he weakly returned the gesture.

Though he didn't hug me the same, it felt like the world disappeared when I'm with him. There's so many indescribable emotions I feel when I'm around him. It feels as if all the weights have been lifted off my shoulders and the only worry I have was to stay in his arms as I listened to his steady heart beat.

"I miss you" I spoke softly as I clutched onto him tighter. He didn't shift a muscle, nor did he answer.
A tear slid from the corner of my eye and dropped onto his shoulder. It was then that he moved, holding me tighter and wrapping his arms around my waist. I laid my head on his shoulder as I released my tears, missing his presence for the last four years. He stroke the back of my head, calming me down.
I finally let go over my resistance, knowing I couldn't stay like that forever, no matter how much I wanted to.
"I'm sorry, Niall" I say, tears still streaming down my cheeks.

He looked to the side, in attempt to hide his face, but I could see the droplets escaping from his eyes.

"I really am... And I know I should've told you everything and I know I'm a little late but I will now. I was stupid and I should've told you what was going on, instead of running off like that without an explanation. I still love you Niall. I never stopped and I never will. Not one feeling has altered, if so, I miss and love you more. I know an apology can never make up for all this, but this is where I'm going to start. You deserve to know everything and I need you to know. I miss you Niall, I miss you more than anything else in the world and I would never do anything to hurt you again if I got the chance" I blurted out, not knowing I would complete a full speech.
He didn't say anything. He lifted his fore arm up to his eyes, wiping away the tears before turning to face me.
"Tabitha, you have no idea how much that hurt me. I had no idea why you were leaving and no one told me either. I lived four years not knowing what I did wrong or what happened. I was worried, but I couldn't talk to you. I spent years still waiting for you to come back. I spent days wondering if you would still love me. I didn't know what to do and I couldn't face anyone... You really hurt me" he spoke, ripping my heart into a million pieces.
"I'm sorry" I say.
"I know you are, but it hurt"
"I'm sorry" I repeated, as if it would make a difference, "I'm sorry, so so sorry... I didn't mean for it to turn out the way it did. I had no control over any of my decisions. It hurt me too and I spent nights, desiring to be with you... But I couldn't, I couldn't because of my mother and I love you and you know I would never in a life time hurt you intentionally" I sobbed, looking into his eyes, "I'm sorry"
He stared at me, his crystal blue orbs looking into my green. I could feel the fast pace of my heart as it beated in my chest. I could feel the butterflies lurch inside of me as the silence devoured us both.

What's going through his mind? Does he still love me? Of course he doesn't... I did a terrible thing and can't just come back four years later expecting him to still feel the same way. I feel terrible! No, terrible's not the word, I feel so much much worse, like a hundred times worse than that. How could I even let myself do such a thing?

I could feel the drilling pain in my chest as I waited for his response, if he had one. My hand tightened in a fist, digging my long nails into my skin as a small punishment for hurting the boy I love.

"I'm sorry" I say again, although that wouldn't do anything.

"I love you too" he finally whispered after a long, dreadful silence.
I could feel a smile rising on my lips as he opened his arms and embraced me in a tight, warm hug. I returned the gesture, except tighter. I inhaled his scent, relaxing my body as we stood there, happily with the company of the other's presence.

"Will you still be my girlfriend?" he asked, making a few joyful tears form in my eyes.
"Yes" I answer with sobs, "yes"
"Thank god" he sighed, hugging me tighter.
"I love you"
"I love you too" he returned, before leaning in a for a kiss that I've been dying for each and everyday for the last four years.

We stayed in each other's arms for a long time, neither of us willing to let go, but after time, we got tired and fell asleep together on the couch, the way we used to. His body warmth comforting me as our fingers tangled together.

I don't know why he took me back, but whatever the reason was, he must really still love me to do that after everything I did. I love him and would never do another thing to hurt him. So in that moment, I made myself a vowel; to never harm the boy I love and to protect him the way I should.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey hey hey! (: omfg, it's like the end! I still have the epilogue to go and then that's the end! I can't believe it's gone this fast! :o I would just like to thank you all for the support you gave me through out this story, it meant so much to me that you liked it (: thank you and I hope you enjoyed it. There's one more chapter left, so I hope you're ready for it! :D

Ok :3 so umm, as may a lot of you know, I LOVE 5SOS and I have been trying soooooo hard to catch their attention on twitter, but it's not working ): so I was hoping that maybe you guys could help me? :3 you don't have to, but it would be absolutely amazing if I could get a little help trying to get them to follow me or see my tweets! I'll love you to the moon and back if you do! You don't have to at all! But if you do, then thank you so so so much .xx my twitter: @daymi_dum

And by the way, earlier in the story in one of the author's note I mentioned my tumblr, but I changed my URL :3 so if you want to, you can follow me .xx http://oblivious-state-of-mind.tumblr.com

Oh and by the way, I got over my crush :D but he's not making it easy for me -.- he unbuttoned his shirt in class and wore a beanie and fuaaark, why is he so good looking? Ahahahaha, but yeah (: I'm over him and thank you guys for the support and advice you have given me, really means a lot to me .xx

Thank you! (: .xx