By Your Side (Twenty One Pilots)

Lost But Not Forgotten

Tyler waited out the night. Maybe she was over at her sister’s place again and fell asleep watching a movie? that had happened a few times before. so Tyler waited out the night and called Lily’s sister, Megan, in the morning. They idly talked back and forth for a little while since they had grown close after the two years Tyler had been dating Lily, but when Tyler asked if Lily had been around, Megan was confused.

“She hasn’t been around to see me in two months.”

And that’s when Tyler started to really worry.

He called her mom and dad, questioned all their mutual friends and classmates. He called her multiple times a day and checked her social media but she never picked up or posted anything or even did so much as to like a picture or comment on something. He never heard anything back from anyone.

Her stuff was still scattered around his apartment and her favorite foods still filled the fridge. Her purse was on the kitchen table and her charger was still in the wall. Everything was there except for her and the clothes she had worn that day.

After two days of waiting for a text or a call or a distant family member to tell him that she was okay and just needed some space or went on a surprise visit, Tyler called the police. They searched her computer and emails for any traces of talking to someone, they tracked her credit card to see if she had been preparing from something. They even looked through her closet and asked Tyler what she was wearing. It was a light blue dress, almost the color of her eyes. She was in sandals, too. Nobody just leaves in that. She didn’t even take a jacket.

Tyler broke. He couldn’t find his love. He lost her in a way he never thought he would. He didn’t protect her like he had promised her family he would. She was gone.

The worst thoughts started to creep into Tyler’s head. What if she had been kidnapped? Raped? Murdered? All three? What if someone took her only to hold a ransom? Had she gotten caught up in something she shouldn’t have? Had she gone in too far? Is that why she had been so distant lately?

Had he done something wrong? Did he not notice that she was in trouble? Could he have saved her? Stopped her?

Tyler fell into a deep depression. Paired with whatever he already had going on in his head, the rest of the school year was especially tough on Tyler.

Three years passed and Tyler turned 24. The police closed the active search after finding her phone washed up on a beach in Florida.They told Tyler and Lily’s family that they would keep their eyes open for anything else, but not to be surprised if her body turned up without a heartbeat.

A year later they heard from Lily.

She called her mother from a phone booth located somewhere in Canada to tell her that she was fine. Not to worry. She had been in love with a man and had run away. She needed to start her life over in a new place and wanted to do it herself. She didn't want anyone to stop her or hold her back, so she just left.

Tyler asked her mother if she had mentioned him. Lily had said he had stopped being worth her time six months into their relationship. They had dated for two years. Tyler had been in love with her. He thought the feeling was mutual.

The moment after he hung up the phone with Lily’s mother he started to pack. He put all of his stuff in boxes and loaded the car. He told the apartment manager to do whatever he wanted with the stuff he left inside and that he would pay rent for the next few months as long as it meant he could leave right away. Tyler didn’t even wait for a response. He drove off down the road and found a place on the opposite side of town. New streets. New places. Lily had never been there.

If Lily didn’t need him, he didn’t need her. If she didn’t love him, he didn’t love her. If she forgot about him, he would forget about her.

Those were the biggest lies Tyler had ever told himself.