Shaira's Inbox

2- Nobody

Nigel's words were beautiful. But they were unbelievable and scary at the same time.

Shaira knew she was different from the rest. Other girls were a lot prettier and more noticeable than her. Besides, they were much suited to his age. Why would the guy look on her?

For long years, she had thought that she was a nobody. That things would only get complicated if she involved herself with a guy.

It was not only because she was the eldest among the girls in the family that she had to set a good example to her sisters, but also because she was afraid of whatever possible rants if her family learns about it. They were set to the thought that one day, Shaira was going to be successful.

In order to achieve it, distractions, like boys, had to be off limits. 

Emily Dickinson's poem reminded her that I am nobody! Who are you? It was a question that played in her mind as she and Nigel were having a text conversation.

                    "Why can't you believe me when I say I love you?"

Are you -Nobody -too? Then there's a pair of us! Shaira discerned that his tone was serious.

At the back of her mind, she wanted to feel like he was also a nobody. She felt guilty for being so playful with the way she treated him.She thought that not being serious would make him leave her alone as soon as possible.

She was afraid that if this communication continued, it would ruin her life goals. Finding a nice guy was out of it.

Nigel was a nice man. He's not one of those rudely mannered boys way back in school. His smile was demure and his eyes were very tantalizing that it felt like Shaira was melting whenever he stared at her.

She was being insensitive. He did not deserve to be treated like a joke. Panic rushed through her, and she had to make an effort by a cordial reply this time.

"I'm sorry, do you hate me?" 

Shaira could only wish he would reply and say no. She was anticipating that she would be ignored for being too insensitive. Good thing she heard her phone's message alert tone again and the message left her hands feeling cold.

"No... I love you. It's just annoying that you always make fun of yourself."

What?! This was sounding weird.

Her defenses were falling out little by little.She understood that she was the master of herself and that she could do whatever she wanted, laugh, and say things whenever.

This Nigel, her friend was suddenly upset for making fun of herself. Does this mean that he really cared for her?

The magic words... They seemed real. How could he just say it without any warning?

It was hitting her like the waves of the ocean; drowning her defenses but enjoying the spell. 

The phone beeped again.

"Shaira Alonzo, I love you."

What does she have to say? She started pressing reply but there was another beep...

" Can you be my girlfriend?"

Girlfriend. Wow. She felt like a real girl now. Girlfriend is a big word. It is a responsibility. It is giving and taking. She did not know how to be a good girlfriend. 

He was probably not kidding.

At the other end of the line, Nigel was nervous. His hands almost moist and trembling as he typed. His sweat rolled down the side of his forehead. It was a gamble.The situation called for it. He could not hide his feelings anymore. He knew it would explode anytime. It suddenly happened tonight. She thought of her all the time even if she did not see her after the last semester. He was dazzled by her shining eyes whenever she talked about literature and how she smiled innocently with him. There was nothing worth insulting about her, that is why he could not stand seeing the girl he loved insult herself.