My Innocent Love (Book 1 In Novice Love Series)

Chapter 22- Heart to Soul Talks

The Past is something on which no one wants to talk about because it is the most sensitive spot of one's life especially the ones who have seen the most heart-shattering betrayals and cruelty by their own family and friends. No one wants to be in the pain of reminiscing those memories which have given them a dark painful scar on their soul which can't be seen physically but could only be felt in their eyes. When that nostalgia hits you, you can't seem to debate on how to express or what to do because all you feel is loneliness of being abandoned by your people when you needed them the most. But won't it be sensible to say your feelings out to someone who loves you for who you were and who you are? Your heart will break surely in talking about it but you won't be burden with your painful conscience anymore.

Aayush sensed stiffness of Raisha as she kept on fidgeting with her fingers not saying a word. He could see, she was trying to fight back her tears because no matter how strong and confident she shows herself, she was still a human, who has emotions, who got hurt by everyone, who was still trying to make her life free from all those painful memories.

"Raisha, it's okay if you are not comfortable in talking about it. I just asked like that please don't close yourself again", he consoled her by placing his one arm around her shoulder and she moved closer to him resting her head on his chest while he held her other hand.

"I was just 12 when it all began. It was like a normal day and I was playing with my brothers when suddenly I felt a sharp pain in my knee and I lost balance and fell down hurting myself", she started after a long silence between them while Aayush just held her in his arms, shielding her from all the pain which she was reliving in that moment.

"Jay immediately went and called mom as my other cousins helped me up. At that time my cousins were like real brothers to me who loved and encouraged me so seeing me suddenly in hurt even they got worked up. By the time mom came the pain increased so much that all I was doing was to scream out loud so that it would just vanish away somehow but nothing happened, it kept on increasing until the doctor injected me a sedative to make me unconscious once we reached the hospital. They did all the blood tests and X-rays for hours but no one was able to go into the details. My parents were worried but for me, they acted as if it wasn't a big thing. For three days I was hospitalized until Raman uncle came from Delhi to check up on me. He was dad's great friend and specialize in such physical pains too. He did my entire check up for hours, did my all X- rays and blood tests again and after a week, he told dad that I am suffering from JRA", she said with her tears flowing continuously as Aayush's eyes brimmed with tears too, but he controlled himself from not showing his pain in front of her.

"Days passed by, but there was no change in my condition and on top of that I didn't even know what it was. Raman uncle had to leave for Delhi due to his commitments but he prescribed me medicines which were like poison but that too didn't work on me. I used to cry all day in pain as I felt so helpless and weak but nothing happened. Only my parents and Jay used to come to my aid while the rest of the family distanced themselves from me completely since the time, they got to knew about my disease", she added with an emotionless laugh at the last part.

"At first, I thought that maybe they are worried for me and they get hurt seeing me in pain so I didn't pester anyone because I myself was finding it hard to see my reflection in the mirror so how can I ask anyone else to do? But one day...", her voice cracked as she recalled the first time, her family humiliated her on Rajat's birthday party.

"It was Rajat Bhai's birthday and there was a big party. His all friends came for the celebration. I made a card especially for him when my hands were not supporting me but still, he was my cousin and I thought I will make him happy. I went to wish him in his room limping on my feets as my swelling was worse in those times. He let me in his room but it wasn't like before but I didn't show my hurt. I wished him by hugging him like always and he pushed me away yelling at me to not spoil his clothes because of the medicines that were applied on my hands and knees".