Chapter 38
Zendaya.
It had been a week since Craig’s death, and I don’t really know what’s wrong with me… Since that night, I’ve been throwing up every morning… Maybe, it’s because I have a guilty conscience about how things went. I remember gripping the sleeve of his jacket just as his foot slipped. I was pulling him away from the ledge, and everything was going to be fine… But, next thing I know, I feel his weight shifting closer toward the ledge. I remember being pushed out of the way by both Alix and Chresanto. I looked at Rayan as my heart sank into my stomach.
Rayan looked into my eyes from afar, but our eye contact was broken when Alix called for him to support her while she leaned downward. I was just standing by, praying and crossing my fingers. “Please, don’t let this happen,” I whispered, my fingers finding their way into my hair. I gripped my hair as my breathing began to shorten. Rayan looked back at me, worry covering his face. Ray said a few things to Chres before approaching me. I was shaking and my eyes were tearing up. I could barely breathe. “Where’s your inhaler?” Rayan asked me. I couldn’t even focus on the question. I was too worried about what was happening with Prod. Rayan grabbed my clutch purse and rummaged through it before pulling my inhaler out of my purse. He placed it to my mouth. “Breathe,” he spoke soothingly his other hand holding me by the waist. I looked into his eyes while breathing and taking in what was in my inhaler. “Are you okay?” he asked. I nodded. “Yo, pull us up, Rayan!” Alix’s voice yelled. Rayan ran back to the ledge and gripped Alix’s hips while standing behind her. He began to pull Alix who was holding onto Prod. Rayan wrapped his arms around Alix’s waist as they began to pull Prod up, but then…
His hand wasn’t connected to Alix’s anymore… “Zendaya, are you okay, Sweetheart?” My mother asked while holding back my hair as I threw up. Her speaking pulled me out of my thoughts. “I-I’m fine,” I nodded while flushing the toilet. “I think we need to go to the doctor,” my mother suggested. “Fine,” I sighed. “This is one of many mornings this has happened, Zendaya. Are you pregnant?” my mother asked. “What? Absolutely not!” I shook my head. “It’s okay if you are. I’m your mother, remember? You can tell me anything,” she spoke as I stood and reached for my toothbrush. “Mom! I’m not pregnant! God!” I shrieked. “Fine… But, we’re going to the doctor today,” she spoke before leaving me to my own company.
As soon as she was gone, I closed the bathroom door. I looked into the mirror before lifting up my shirt to look at my stomach… “I can’t be pregnant,” I whispered. I soon thought about my last night at Rayan’s house… I was packing to leave when he stood in the doorway of my room in nothing by boxers and knocked on the door. I was a bit surprised that he was going to take the time to speak to me. I slowly approached him to hug him one last time. “I’m going to miss you, Rayan,” I whispered. I slowly pulled away and looked up at him, his lips meeting mine. His hand made it’s way between my legs as we stumbled back toward the bed. He stripped me of my undergarments along with his before entering me…
I gasped at the thought… There was no protection. “Oh my god… How am I going to tell Rayan if I promised not to speak to him again?” I whispered to myself.
Rayan.
I awakened next to Alix who was still asleep. I smiled to myself. I wrapped my arms around her as she turned toward me, snuggling up to me. I held her closer to me, moving her leg to where it wrapped halfway around me. “It feels so good to have you back,” she moaned in her sleep before turning away from me. That was the only disadvantage to spending the night with Alix. I would spend the night to keep her company, and I would wake up to her dreaming about Craig. I sighed before wrapping my arms around her again. I held her close, her body making me feel cozy. There was a brief silence before she turned toward me, her eyes half open. “Was I talking in my sleep again?” she asked. Her voice in the morning was so cute to me. It was small and light, as if an angel were speaking. I eventually nodded as a response. “I’m sorry… It’s just going to take a little time to get over this,” she sighed, pulling away from me and sitting at the edge of her bed. I sat up also, scooting closer toward her. I whispered in her ear. “And I’ll be here to take care of you during this time.” She tensed up slightly as I sat extremely close to her. “I’m here, remember?” I spoke, looking into her eyes. She nodded as I wrapped my arms around her waist. “I’m here,” I repeated as she hugged me tightly, her fingers slipping into my hair.
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