Desolation // l.p.

Chapter XVIII

"Do you come here often?" Mr. Payne shouts over the loud music playing in the club. I can feel the bass playing, vibrating in my chest. I find it comforting as the music blares and people around us dance to the slow methodical sounds.

"No!" I yell back to him, my eyes scanning the club. I doubt he actually heard me but I'm not going to bother trying again. It's not necessarily an important thing for him to know. I want to find my mom and the others. I'm hoping the sooner I find them, the sooner I can have a drink. I always have more fun at clubs if at have at least one drink in me. I shove through a few people. Passing a man groping someone and a woman who is scantily dressed. The lights change colors and flash, hazardous to anyone who gets easy migraines. Luckily, I'm not one of those people.

"I see your mother!" He whispers loud enough for me to hear through the noise after pulling me closer to him. He begins to drag me through the crowd and I let him, thinking it will be easier for us to get around if he leads the way. He's so much bigger and easier to see than I am. He has to be at least six foot- give or take an inch. Sweaty people bump into me but I find it more exciting than gross, hoping that I will be able to join them soon.

The truth is, I love going to places like these. I've only been clubbing twice before tonight. It makes me sad that I can't come more often. Especially as I walk through the crowd and see so many attractive guys dancing and just waiting for a one night stand. When I was here before, I was with Sebastian, so dancing with other people was out of the question. He and I would dance in the corner where it was dark, and he would whisper unrepeatable things to me as his hands roamed my body. We would get drunk and go back to his apartment only to end up passing out on his bed before anything steamy could happen. But those were always the fun nights, when we could be ourselves and just spend some genuine time together. Plus, I loved dancing with him, in the crowd of people. It almost felt forbidden when his hands would touch me in public. Whenever Sebastian and I danced, it was an act of being carefree.  All of my problems would disappear, they would leave through the window and go to a place where they were no where to be seen until it was all over. That's the plan for tonight. Dancing with a stranger who I'll never see again anyway and feel worry free, even if it only lasts for an hour or two.

"Sarah!" I hear my sister Genevieve yell and as Liam and I reach the edge of the dance floor I am yanked from him by my sister. Her arm goes around my neck, dangling off my shoulder as she walks me to the table, her feet faulter and stumble and I wonder how much she has already had to drink. Considering she is underage I didn't think it would have been that much but she honestly looks smashed. "I thought you guys would never get here." She smiles an evil grin before leaning closer to me and whispering "How was your date?".

"It wasn't a date!" I snap at her quietly so Liam doesn't hear and elbow her in the rib. She laughs, barely affected by my assault and sits down in a booth where my mother and Sam are sitting with drinks in their hands. Liam takes the chair on the edge of the table as I scoot into the sofa seat next to my sister. My dress slightly rises as I sit down, the black leather is cold under my newly exposed legs.

My eyes drift to Liam, whose face is turned down into a frown. His eyes anxiously roam our surroundings, taking in the people, heavy brick walls and neon signs littering them. The place is cliché, looking like every other night club in the city. He looks so uncomfortable. Which is a little hard to believe that a place like this could make him uneasy. He seems like the kind of guy who would go to clubs often. Maybe a more popular and exclusive club, but a club none the less. I wonder where he goes for fun, or what he does. Does he choose to spend his nights free with strangers and women? Or alone at home?

"How about a drink?" I ask leaning a bit closer for him to hear. My hands tap along to the beat of the music as he nods.

"Yeah I'll go get us something." He says standing up not giving me a chance to argue. I was actually going to go, but since he is willing I'll let him go. Plus, thinking about it now, leaving him with my mother is a terrible idea. Who knows what other embarrassing story about me she could conjure up and humiliate me with.