Desolation // l.p.

Chapter XXIII

"Wait, so now your mom is getting married?" Victoria asks in confusion. Her french-tipped manicured fingers are stirring her strawberry margarita with the straw.

"No. I mean- I don't know. Sam is asking her if she'll marry him. Whether she will say yes or not, I'm not positive. The whole situation is surprising to me." I sigh, staring down at the worn wooden table in the bar. I try to imagine all of the people that sat here before me, drinking away the loneliness or misery they are trying to avoid. Or even the people in celebration and joyful moods, just looking for a good time. Much like Victoria.

"I guess we'll find out." She smiles before bringing her mixed drink up to her mouth and downing the rest of it quickly. She releases a satisfied sigh as she places the empty glass back on the table. I shift awkwardly when she notices I've been watching her.

"Seriously Sarah. Just get a drink, I'll even pay for it." She suggests and I shake my head immediately.

"No. I'm serious about giving it up for a while. I've been making too many mistakes recently that still remain unfixed to continue making more and do nothing about the wholes I've already dig myself into." I tell more myself than her. I do want something to drink, I want to let loose and have fun with my friend. But giving up alcohol for a little while is something that I need to do. About a week or two after the club, what my mother had said to Sam really began to sink in.

"They remind me of their father more and more everyday"

The idea of ending up like him makes me cringe, especially since I've gone most of my life despising him. Fifteen years without seeing him, and still feeling so resentful. My sister always told me that I hold grudges and she couldn't be more wrong. Especially in this case when it comes to my father.

"Whatever." She shrugs and stands up from the table. I watch her walk tpwards the bar to get another drink. Sebastian catches my eye. He's pourig beer into a glass, his almond eyes focused on the task.

I haven't spoken to him since the night we shared last month. I haven't reached out to him and he hasn't reached out to me. I should have though. I know I have to apologize for what I did. More so for the fact tha I ran out the way I did. It was so immature of me. If I could redo that night, I'm not sure it would go any different though. It was mortifying, calling out someone elses name and my boss's at that? I wish it would have been someone else's name. Anyone but him.

I comtemplate going over to him and talking, to see how he is doing and to make sure that I didn't completely ruin the friendship that we once had. Upon my decision to finally go over, Victoria returns. She's already halfway done her next drink. I shift in my seat, deciding to hold out for a while before talking to him. I have a feeling that I'll be here for a while anyway.

"So, are ypu going to New York with Mr. Payne?" Victoria asks, fishing her finger into her margarita and pulling out the cherry that they put into it. I try to think of any mentioning of New York on Liam's schedule for the next month, failing to think of anything.

"New York?" I ask leaning forward onto the table, intrigued. How could she know about a trip he's taking before I do?

"Yeah, isn't that trip some time this month?" she asks as if I already know about it.

"I don't know anything about a trip to New York." I tell her shaking my head in confusion. If there is a trip coming up for Mr. Payne and his assistant is expected to go along as well, shouldn't I know about it by now?

"You should." Victoria says, still distracting herself with the glass of red cocktail sitting in front of her. "Then again maybe it wasn't a business trip. Mr. Payne and Mia were pretty close." Victoria laughs, as if she was reminding herself of the fact. Mia, it's a name that seems familiar but I'm not sure where I've seen it before.