Desolation // l.p.

Chapter XXXIII

"Stop." I protest, my eyes stare at the floor as I refuse to look at him, look into the eyes that torture me.

"Admit it." he says aggressively and I sob.

"Stop it." I demand a bit harder.

"Not until you admit it." he growls. I can't do this anymore.

"Knock it off!" I shout as I muster up the courage to push him away. He stumbles back a few steps but doesn't try to entrap me again. "Why do you need to hear it?" I sob. His breathing is erratic, his chest moving at a quick pace. "If you already know the truth, then why are you torturing me?" I breathe out as I finally get a chance to wipe away the tears on my cheeks. Liam takes a deep breath in, as if he is finally satisfied.

"I'm sorry." he apologizes and I scoff.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I ask in disbelief as he stands trapped with a blank expression on his smug face. He looks at me in sorrow and the complete change in behavior has left me aghast, and even a bit angry.

"I- I didn't mean to-"

"You just stood there, humiliated me, and all you have to say is sorry and that you didn't mean it?" I raise my voice, furious with everything that has happened in the past two minutes. I'm so angry that my body is shaking, I'm seeing red around the corner of my eyes. A small knock interrupts us, and the door opens without response.

"Is everything okay in here?" Alex asks as he leans in through the door. With how loud I've been, and how aggressive Liam was I can't believe that someone didn't come in here sooner. Alex's expression is rigid when he takes in the situation in front of him. I'm sure I look like a mess; makeup running, eyes red, cheeks puffy and Liam looks as if he is embarrassed to have been caught in here with me.

"Everything is fine. I was just leaving." Liam says lowly, his eyes hesitantly searching mine as if he is asking if I want him to. I turn away, hoping he will take that as a yes. I can't look at him anymore, at least not right now. I assume he is gone when Alex walks into my office, placing his hand on my shoulder. I jump at first, frightened that it may have been Liam but let out a sigh when I see it is only him.

"Are you okay?" he asks politely. I know if I said yes he wouldn't believe me. He's not the type to ignore someone in tears. He's way too sentimental.

"I don't want to talk about it." I sob and pull away from his touch. He looks hurt for a moment and I want to brush it off, but I'm having problems and I need somebody on my side. "I'm sorry I just. . ." I trail off. I want to justify my actions but I can't. I can't do anything until I forget about what just happened in this room. "Need a distraction." I admit and give him a small smile.

"Okay, do you want to go get lunch? We can talk about it. . ." He suggests and I shake my head. That won't be enough. I need something to stop the part of me that is frightened, on edge, kind of aroused, and pissed off all at the same time.

"Kiss me." I breathe and pull him to me. He's caught off guard hesitant to kiss me back. Probably because I was a crying mess only moments ago, but this can distract me from the thoughts of Mr. Payne, inches from my face, lips almost touching, his hot breath on my neck.

I groan when Alex bites my lip, sliding his tongue into my mouth as I gasp. I peer behind him, assuring that the door is closed. It's probably not locked but the thought of someone walking in here and catching us turns me on. Alex walks us backwards until my ass hits my desk, his hands wrap under my thighs as he pulls me up, setting me on it. I ignore the few things that fall over, the papers I may be sitting on, caught up in the moment.

His hand goes between my legs, my dress giving the access he needs to push my panties aside, his fingers stroke me and my head falls back, a moan escaping my mouth.

"Ssshhh..." He hums. His other hand covers my mouth, muffling any sounds I make. He circles my entrance before pushing a finger in me and I'm reminded of last night when he made me come this way, twice. Relentlessly and back to back. The memory brings butterflies to my stomach. He pumps his finger a few times before adding another, but I swat him away. He looks confused until I grab his belt buckle, undoing it and pulling it from his waist.

He unbuttons his pants and pushes them down where they pool around his ankles. I can see the outline of him, hard and restrained. My fingers loop into the sides of his boxers and I tug them down enough for his cock to spring free. I take him in my hand, sliding my hand along his entire length.

"I can't believe we are doing this." He gasps as I slowly begin to pump him in my hand.

"Do you not want to?" I ask, knowing very well that he does. I bite my lip, and his mouth falls open as I quicken my wrist.

"Fuck yeah I do." He grunts as he takes himself from my hand, he reaches down between us pushing my panties to the side again so that he can position himself. I don't expect it when he thrusts into me. Hard. I cry out and his lips immediately find mine, he swallows all of my sounds as his hips move quickly.

I can tell he doesn't intend for this to take long. Images of last night flash through my mind. Him above me, thrusting slowly, hips rotating and him hitting the spot every time. I groan, perspiration forms on his forehead and the air in my office becomes thick. He breaks our kiss, pushing me back on my desk, raising my legs higher. My head falls to the side and I see the manuscript I was reading earlier. I cover my own mouth, afraid of screaming from all of the pleasure coursing through me. The whispered curse words that fall from his lips and the occasional moaning of my name take me higher.

"Oh god. . ." He mumbles and his eyes screw shut in concentration. His fingers dig into my hips as he holds onto me, the skirt of my dress pushed up by my bellybutton. "Sarah. . . Look at me." He pleads as his eyes open again, the green in them have turned into a dark evergreen color. My eyes meet his and I fear I might lose it by just looking at him. "Shit." He swears and his thrusts become more sloppy, less articulated. He's close. I'm close.

My vision begins to blur as a warm feeling jolts through my body, the same one that I felt many times last night. I bite down on my hand to keep from making a sound as I come undone, my back arching off of the wood of my desk.

"Fuck." He swears one last time as his body goes rigid, all of his movements faltering as he rides out his orgasm, slowly but still pushing into me. We take a moment to catch our breaths, his sandy hair sticking to his forehead, my own falling out of the bun I'd had it in. "You're amazing." He mutters as he pulls my limp body up to him. He peppers my lips with kisses, trailing down my jaw and to my neck.

"You're not too bad yourself." I tell him breathlessly, still struggling to catch mine. He laughs and nuzzles his head into the crook of my neck, holding me as if I might disappear.

I close my eyes. Relishing the fact that he is a good choice for a distraction when it comes to sex. If only he could be a good distraction for my feelings for Liam, too.

A/N: that escalated so quickly, idek what the heck just happened.

Anyway here is another update, I did this because I wanted to make a proposal, and here it is.

I will update again, today! IF we reach 400 votes on this story OR we get to 2,000 comments in the 1D Watty Spring Awards. Right now this story has about 1.7k comments and I am trying to beat this other one that has 7,000. My awesome friend MagicAl_WinGs_  has been commenting all night, and all day and still going strong (bless her soul). When you comment it can be whatever. It can literally just be a letter, like it seriously does not matter. SO if one of these two things happen I will update again today.

If you do not know the info for the Watty Awards, go to 1DWattyyAwards  and in their Spring Watty Awards for 2016, Desolation is number 42 and you can vote and comment as many times as you like!!

If not then it might be a few days and if we do make it, who knows. Maybe I will make more offers on updating because I am free all day. It's up to you guys :)

I love all of your dedication -Rachel Xx