2013
Narcissism:
I suggest it's a word
You're fairly accustomed to.
I would certainly hope so
Due to your actions.
It's ironic how many nights
I spent trying to please you,
Hoping you would finally
See me in a different light.
And now here you are at my feet,
Begging and pleading for my forgiveness.
Why would I grant you a gift
You never gave to me?
Regardless of how ruthless
Your actions were,
I kept quiet and did exactly as you asked.
In my mind, it was the only way
To not end up dead.
But spending countless years
Suffering in silence
Began to take its toll on me.
I would no longer keep my lips sealed.
I would no longer put myself in agony
For the sake of your needs.
Why would I?
You never did
The same for me.
I swore to myself I would never
Let anyone hurt me
The way you did.
Yet somehow along the way,
I found myself in the same position,
Placed in misery and contempt
At the hands of another.
I tried to reason with them,
The same way
I tried to reason with you.
But they shared
Your same selfish ways,
And claimed no remembrance.
They fed me fabricated apologies,
And I forced myself to believe them.
I am a forgiving person,
Though not in regard to you.
So you can go ahead and tell me
How much you've changed.
I still see no difference and
You still won't listen
To anything other than
The sound of your own voice.
I am not blind as I once was.
I've learned your ways over the years.
My hostility is a shield
From your manipulation.
My conscience remains perfectly clear.
Unfortunately, I highly doubt you
Can say the same, my dear.
YOU ARE READING
Cyanide Lakes
Poetry❝WE TURN OUR PAIN INTO BEAUTY AND HOPE OTHERS WILL RELATE.❞ Please read the introductory chapter for an extensive trigger-warning. This particular collection contains a wide variety of poems detailing thoughts of insecurity, depression, suicide, etc...
