I Cant Do This Anymore (Nathan Sykes fanfiction)

Broken minds and broken dreams

*Jay's POV

"oh hey char! How you been?" I asked Charly as I opened the door, "Yeah I've been alright, just the last couple of days, Naths been acting weirdly, he barely answers my calls and its like talking to a brick wall when I do see him, Has he been acting strange with you guys too?" The more I think about it, the more I know she has a point. He's getting worse. Ever since the attack, He's fallen in on himself even more then usual. Its scary, he barely leaves his room, barely speaks to any of us,. We havent got any work done in months. Management and the fans are having bitch fits left right and centre and we just have to say "The album will be out soon, we just want to make it perfect" even though we know really its gonna be ages before its ready for release. Its just so frustrating. "Jay?" I look up at Charly's confused face, "Oh erm no not that I've noticed, sorry Char, want to come in? He's in his room"

*Nathans POV

I cant do it anymore, I'm here again, dragging the blade, but the thing is I know I' doing it for the last time, I'm going to die today. The dark voices have gotten the better of me, they won. He won. I know he wont stop until I'm dead. So he'll get what he wants. I've been a recluse, I can't go out for fear of him and Lucy, she says she'll tell charley what happened if I continue going out with her so I just stay in my room all day hoping for something better. My face has just about healed so I can't use the "I'm self concious of my scars" act anymore. I've started cutting my wrists as well but it's winter so I can wear a jumper without it being suspicious.

But I know this is no real life so today I end it all, start fresh. I look at the sleeping pills the doctor gave me on the side table of my bed and a tear falls from my eye, this really is the end. Will I be remembered? Will I be at peace? Will they replace me?

I reach under my bed for the bottle of vodka I got yesterday, take a swig and start to write my letters to my family and the boys. I'm going to out him, tell them what he did to me and there's nothing he can do as I'll be dead and the blood will be on his hands.

I put the pen down, hands shaking as I seal the last letter and place it neatly on the pile on my side table. I sit on the bed and swallow the first pill. Goodbye life, you finall got the better of me.

*Charlys pov

I sit on the couch in the living room with Tom and jay, discussing what had been going on. We talk about the attack and how we think it's made Nathan a nervous wreck who can't leave his room. We talk about ways to help him, counselling, extra security when he's out on his own, supporting him.

"Right" jay says as he stands up "I'm going to get him, we can't help him till he admits what's going on, I'm gonna go bring him downstairs so we can all talk" me and Tom nod as jay walks upstairs. I look at tom and flash him a nervous smile, we both know this won't be easy. We hear jay knock on Nathan's door. "Hey nath, fancy coming downstairs?" No answer, god is this what it's been like? Jay tries again "c'mon mate, Charlys here, we wanna talk to you, we wanna help! Nath please we're all worried!... Right I'm coming in" we hear jay barge naths door open then a yelp " oh my fucking god! Guys quick help! Oh god Babynath what have you done?"....

*have they found him in time? :O

Right guys, there's no real excuse this time, I've been busy and sort of forgot about the fic :( I am so sorry ;( but funny story, I got inspired to write again by reading Phan fan fiction! Haha but seriously I am obsessed with those boys it's not even funny :S

As for the sequel, it's got a cover pic and name! Sorry to say this ones nearly finished :( but you've all got that onebtoblook forward to! :D much love my amazingly patient followers! <3 xxx