She And I

Him or Her

One day, I realized that my dream and my family could not go together. Prince charming was not really my happily ever after. He was, after all, my nightmare. We've decided to separate. The kids were under his care, and I was torn apart. I wanted my kids to stay with me. I just missed Hans and Lise-Lotte so much. I never thought that my career would tear me apart. The split happened that same year I've met Anna. Gosh! I am longing to see her again.

I needed someone to talk to. How? Who? I was not with Gran Agny. Where's Anna? Oh yeah. I didn't get her number. Oh well...how about I go out for a drink and a dance, but definitely not for a man.

As I entered the bar, I saw another angel. This time, it's a man. He looked so innocent, and really charming. Yet I had to look away, because that's against my agenda. By the way, it's not weird for guys to have long hair then. He had blue eyes. His smile was also charming. I had the same chills with Anna that's for sure.

Man, I can't stop thinking about him even if I was busy dancing on the floor. From every angle from the dancefloor, every turn, every step, he was there. I tried my best to go away, but his presence was there.

I was by the counter and asked the nice barista to mix something when the gentleman walked beside me. He happily greeted me, "Hello there." I smelled alcohol and smoke from him, but I was actually focused on his blue eyes. Damn! They're really are beautiful too. It reminded me of Anna again. And yes, I was staring at him for too long , then he snapped his fingers to me and asked, "Are you okay? You are a good dancer there. You really caught my attention."

I snapped and responded, "Sorry. Your eyes are just captivating. You remind me of a friend." He gave a look, then we laughed. I continued, "Thanks, but I don't take my dance moves seriously." He gave me that angelic smile again as he asked me, "Since you enjoy dancing, would that mean that you like music too?"

That was so random, but it would have been rude not to respond. "Yes." I just gave him a smile as he was staring blankly at me, like examining my face and all that. He actually looked familiar to me, and he was probably thinking the same thing to me. So I was waving my hand to get him back, then asked, "Earth to who-are-you-anyway? It seems that I have seen you somewhere."

He blinked then smiled, "The name's Benny... Benny Andersson, and you're the famous Anni-Frid Lyngstad."

"Hahaha!!! Very funny! You're not that Benny from the Hep Stars, right?"

"I actually am." And we laughed. "Drink's on me, yeah?"

"Okay, thank you." This was just out of my agenda now; I felt like I was tamed by a teddy bear. "So is that what the question is about...for verification? Like a code or something?"

He chuckled. "Yes and no. You really are adorable, and your voice too." Then he gave me "that look" ---it was just like the movies, novels, and whatever, as if he was trying to flirt or seduce me or something. "To be honest, I was wondering if I can ask you out for coffee or dinner sometime."

That was fast. I didn't know what to tell him. I was still moving on from that separation, and agreeing to his offer would be against my agenda of having fun. Yet, I was having fun with Benny. I was having second thoughts, to give it a try or not to. Think Frida, think!!! It was a confusion. Okay, I've made up my mind. "Sure, whenever we're free." What was that? Oh well... "Perhaps a week after today, yes?"

He was surprised with my answer, and he smiled again. "Friday, it is."

I had not completely forgotten of my feelings for Anna the moment Benny continued talking. He just kept making sense of everything from music to romance, even philosophy and life. We exchanged ideas. We both loved reading and making music. Finally, we exchanged numbers and addresses.

We were drunk, not extremely drunk, and shared one moment on the dance floor. His hands were on my waist; I had felt he was sincere with his feelings towards me. Yes, I felt like I have encountered two angels in a year--- him and her. I was hesistant to hug him, but I thought what could possibly go wrong by not giving it a try.

I never knew what to do nor what to say, but I just felt secured. I closed my eyes and leaned closer to him. I just allowed the music to move us.

We began dating after that night. We had coffee and dinner, but there was still that longing for a best friend to lean on to. Later on, I had to make a choice. Him or her? I'd rather be with him as of this moment, my guardian angel, man of my life.