Leaving Me

Chapter 9

Here's a wonderful pic of Ashton on the bands snap chat haha

Luke's POV (yea that's right Luke's.)

After school the lads and I couldn't find Franky anywhere so we just gave up after awhile.

"Maybe she went home guys, we will see here tomorrow." I said while kicking at the grass beneath me. We were outside and it was pretty cool outside, it felt nice.

"Yeah your probably right, but anyways what was your problem today? All day you were just mopping around and you barely said a thing." Calum asked me sounding beyond worried.

"I don't know, I just don't like school and I don't feel comfortable with Franky just yet I guess." I responded trying to hold my ground.

"Well, man cut it out your worrying the shit out of me." Calum said sounding annoyed with me.

Sorry I'm fucking depressed Calum.

I do hate lying to Calum, he's my best friend and he tried to help me through my self harm and just all that shit. I wish I wouldn't lie to him but its for the best really.

I still cut some times its my fucking release from all this god awful shitty world. I don't know how to stop. I cover myself up by wearing nirvana bracelets or I just wear a jumper, either way I cover them up.

"Luke hello! Answer me I've been trying to talk to you for the past couple of minutes man!" Ashton said waving his hand in front of my face.

"Sorry, I was just thinking about my route home." I said trying to reassure him. I glanced over at Calum and he just sighed and rolled his eyes.

I'm usually a good liar but Calum always knows when I lie and it annoys the fuck out of me.

"Well, funny you said that I was trying to say to you is that I was wondering if you needed a ride home." Ashton said clearly not picking up on my lie.

"No I am good I'll just walk home." I told him trying not to make eye contact. With out any further questions or any more chit chat I walked away as fast as possible.

"What the hell is his problem! Why won't he ever just fucking tell us anything anymore?" I hear Michael yell from behind me.

Those words made me start running even faster. I just wanted to go home. I hate school. I hate myself. I just wanna, just wanna die. I have wanted to die for so long now but I don't have the balls to actually do anything, I'm so weak. I'm just a waste of...everything.

When I finally reach my small blue house. I jog up the drive way noticing that my mom was home. I opened the door harshly and run to my room.

"Luke is that you?" I heard my mother call from the kitchen.

"Yeah I'll just be in my room." And with that I slammed my door shut not letting her or I say another word.

I jumped into my bed and then just laid there staring at my 'All Time Low' poster on my ceiling.

After awhile of doing
nothing I got tired of that and decided to play a little guitar. Putting my arm under my bed I felt my guitar case and through it onto my bed. I opened the black case to find my base. My father gave it to me when I was 10. He is always at work so he can barely hear me play. I don't complain about it much though because Ashton and Franky have it way worse. I feel bad for them. I strum my guitar once and then twice trying to focus on some notes.

I love writing songs and the best part is just letting your feelings go. I love writing a good song and then showing it to the lads at hand practice. I keep strumming and then it hits me. I begin to sing the words out loud.

"Just look at me in the eye is any one there at all? Is anyone there at all cause I'm not dreaming."

I quickly grab my note pad and write that down.
I am actually proud of that. Yeah okay, hell yeah that was good. Huh finally proud of something I do.

A/N:heeeelllooo beautiful people. Idk how I feel about this chapter. But I wanted to do a Luke POV so you guys could really see what was going on. And huh him and franky are kinda alike. And yea..Luke is depressed and self harms still. I wonder what the lads are going to do if they find out? Well sorry if this chapter sucked I got bored so I thought okay yea maybe an update. Okay so yea byyyeee. Make sure to comment and vote!....if u wanna!:)