Leaving Me

Chapter 13

I thought this was cool^^^

Calums POV:

Luke and I just left the park. I told him that he's going to spend the night at my house so we can talk. Honestly I'm speechless, shocked, and I'm really concerned for Luke.

I'm concerned that he won't make it. Last time when he went through depression he tried to kill himself but thank god he didn't succeed.

It was the one month anniversary of Addie's death and Luke was just emotionless. He was just done, nothing else to it really. He was just lifeless, god he is one fucking strong kid.

But he worries the shit of me. On that day Luke almost died I was awoken by my mum. She came in my room, I can remember it all so well.

She said "Cal honey wake up." My mum was shaking me slightly as she spoke. When I finally woke up she told me that Luke had overdosed. I cried in her arms for what seemed like hours but it was really only 10 minutes. I've never felt like more shit in my life, ever. But I'm starting to get that horrible feeling again when Luke told me earlier that he wanted to die.

I feel so god damn bad for him. I don't know what to do like I don't know how he feels so I can't help him in the right way.

But I will say that I thought Luke was getting better over the summer but now he's not. Ash told me that Luke told Franky that she reminded him of someone, Ash and I think its Addie. But we aren't quite sure. It would make sense though sense he was getting better until they met. But Franky could never know if she is the cause of Luke's pain, I would never want to put that on anyone. I just wish there was a way to bring Addie back I really miss her. She was one of my best friends because I was always with Luke so therefore I was always with Addie. She does kind of look like Franky and act like her , maybe that's the reason why our group likes her so much. But if Franky does remind Luke of Addie I have to find a way to get that to a good use.

Luke and I finally arrive to my house. Our whole walk to my house was silent considering I was just in my thoughts the whole time. But I don't think Luke minded because I think he was too.

I reach into my back pocket of my black skinny jeans and pull out a rusty key that opens my front door. I'm glad that no one is home so if me and Luke get into a argument my parents and sister won't hear. When I unlock the door I let Luke go in first.

He goes straight to the stairs, I already know he is going to my room. And just like I thought he is. Grabbing my door handle he walks into my room and I walk in after him. We both sit down on my bed, I'm so glad I'm home. I've missed just lying in my bed and staring at the nirvana posters on my all white walls.

I look over at Luke "Do you wanna talk about what just happened, you know back at the park?"

"I really regret telling you that. I'm sorry I just put that all on you. I'm sorry I'm such a horrible mate."

"Luke there is nothing wrong with you opening up on how your feeling. I'm glad you told me. And I really need to ask you something. But don't freak out."

"Cal what is it?" Luke seems annoyed I don't know why though.

"Okay, so Ash told me that Franky told him that you told her that she reminded you of someone. Are you talking about Addie?"

What I just said took him by shock. He looked like I took him off guard.
Luke's eyes start to tear up and that's when I realize that Franky does remind Luke of Addie.

"Luke-"
"Please don't, I don't I mean. Why is this so hard to talk to you about? Look, Franky is like another fucking Addie. And it scares the shit out of me. She reminds me of her so much. That's why I feel like shit again. Everything she does is Addie even the way she talks is Addie."

"Luke if she reminds you
of Addie so much then maybe this is sign that Franky is good for you. And maybe she is what you need to find happiness again."

"Cal I don't know I'm scared and I'm mad. I'm so tired of the feeling of wanting to die all the time. But honestly I would be better off dead. It would be best for everyone."

I stand up at Luke's horrific words. Pointing at him I say "Don't you fucking say that again Luke. Your my best friend and my life would be so god damn fucked up without you. Nothing would be same. I need you here, the lads need you here, and so do your parents. You are worth something to us. I know its hard with out Addie. I know its hard to live when you have that type of depression on you but you have to look at the god damn positives man. That's the only way I can help. But you have to help yourself first."

Luke's POV:

I am taken back my Calum's word. He has never been so strict with me before. Maybe people do care about me.

"I don't know how to be happy. I know that sounds crazy but hell I'm crazy." I'm actually feeling the tiniest bit better, I'm sorta glad I told him about this. I take a deep breath and speak again

"What am I suppose to do about Franky if she makes me feel like shit. And I feel really fucking bad for feeling like shit because she hasn't done anything wrong its just-"

"Luke stop you need to try and use Franky as a positive in your life. If she makes you remember Addie then use it to your happiness. She can help you make new memories as a new best friend that your sister was for you."
He sits back down on his bed, I think he has calmed down.

Maybe he is right though I could try to be friends with her but I don't know how to do this.
"I don't think I can. I don't think this is good. I can't do that to Franky."

"Your doing nothing wrong with being friends with her. You never even gave her a chance. Your so fucking quiet all the time, you don't even try."

"Shut the fuck up. Don't you dare tell me I'm not fucking trying here cal. Don't you dare fucking say that again!"

"Okay fuck man." He puts his hands up in surrender.

"Look I'm sorry, I'm just kind of fucked up right now. Can we just call it night I'm fucking exhausted."

"Yeah okay goodnight asshole."

I quietly laugh to myself at Calum's remark. He always knows how to make things slightly better. We both don't even bother changing out of our clothes. I walk over to his light switch and turn it off. I lay down on the floor not even caring that its the most uncomfortable thing ever.

A/N: hi guys I'm bored so I decided to update. This is shout out to my friends Claudia and Aubrey who always read and vote this story. I love you guys. But okay yeah so maybe Franky is actually going to be good for Luke. Idk how I feel about this chapter I guess it was just a filler sense I'm bored. Sorry that this story is so depressing right now. But it will get happy soon. Okay well until next time by! <3