"Nivia it's okay baby don't cry its not your fault"Kylie said as I cried to her and kaylen about the event's of yesterday
"It is my fault everything's my fault I always fuck up the good things in my life with my fears that night when we were supposed to have sex I started having flashbacks and I screamed for Terrell not to hurt me because in my head his hands felt the same as Charles the look in his eyes after he seen the fear in mine I still can't stop thinking about it"I said choking out every word as the tears continued to burned my eyes
"Its not your fault nivia you haven't fully recovered from the past event's in your life and how could anybody expect you to just because the horrors ended months ago that doesn't mean that the pain isn't still lurking inside of you don't sit here and blame yourself for something you had no control over then just focus on what you can control now don't let the thoughts of him consume you nivia he can longer hurt you unless you let him your fear of Charles is the only thing keeping him alive"kaylen said looking into my eyes
I swear even though both of the twins know me and their both some what in tuned with my thoughts kaylen has this look she gives me and it's like she can see my soul or something it's like she can see beyond what everyone else See's in me it's a weird feeling but I trust her with it because I can always count on her to understand me when no one else takes the time too
"What about iree he kissed me at the skatepark and I swear I'd never felt so many feelings consume my heart at one time it's like it was freshman year again when he kissed me under the bleachers after they had won that championship game and he asked me to be his girlfriend in front of the whole school"I said
Everything seemed less complicated then even with what Charles was doing to me it didn't even hurt me as much when iree was around he always took me away from my world of hurt my thoughts were not about when was the next time he was gonna hurt me but when would be the next time Iree kissed me he had my heart and I was willing to give him everything I had to offer sad to say he wasn't willing to do The same Iree had other dreams back then dreams that did not include him settling down with me
"How did Terrell find out about the kiss"Kylie questioned
"He said at least other females would have the decency to cheat in private not a public skatepark where his family could see me"I said
"Wait the only family he has here is tony trey and Chris "kaylen said
"Wait kaylen didn't trey and Chris say they were going to the skate park yesterday"?Kylie questioned
"Oh shit their the ones who told "!
"I'm about to call chris and curse his ass the fuck out because he had no business being messy I told him about minding his own business not everybody else's "Kylie said grabbing her phone
"No don't do that of course they were gonna tell him that's their brother I'd tell Noelle if India kissed someone else because he's my brother "I said
"So what are you gonna do then nivia"?kaylen questioned
"I guess I'm just gonna give him the time he needs to cool off and the I'll try to talk to him"I said putting my head in my hands
"Well we love you boo and we're here if you need us"Kylie said
"Thanks guys I love y'all too "I said hugging them
(God I miss Terrell)
