Dear friend ,💚
How are you? I'm a mess,
People are just uhg, the guy who I told you about that was all happy till he looked at me, yeah, he's been a jerk a lot lately and I'm just so fluffing stupid that I let him affect me , again and again and again and I'm done, I'm just mother fluffing done, he's mad at me for basically being sad, funny right? And he thinks I do it for attention? Hell no, that's a scary thing for someone to be doing for attention, he was basically cyber bullying me about it earlier today, I almost broke down in tears about 4 times today just thinking of the guilt I have about it, even though I shouldn't have any like I feel like its all my fault, that I have to fix it and he won't let me ,* sigh* he just won't listen, one of my friends wants to "kill him" i told her he doesn't deserve it.
Also update on you, earlier this week you told me I would see you later this week, I haven't heard from you since, you worry me 💚 you worry me a lot,
Mom tool me to a councilors yesterday, asked me like fifty questions before I went in... Then he preceded to ask me more questions for a test for depression and anxiety and apparently I'm in the extreme with both, 81/100 for depression (100 being the worst) and 82/100 for anxiety, its just lovely he recommended a book for me to read to kinda help a bit, he said he had hope for me , I don't think he should, I'm a hopeless case , its too late for me, I had to promise a few people I wouldn't cut any more, after you took away my sharpest blade, god I'm just done hurting people its not fixing anything, I can find other ways to calm me down, hopefully, preferably , I'm not sure why I'm telling you this 💚 and I definitely sure you can't see any of this, idk I guess I just like the thought of being able to rant to you even though your not here, idk, I have to go though, 💚
Love 🍄💚
