Dear friend,💚
How are you? I'm a messe e ,
Moms basically been drunk for the past 4 days, its lovely, (note the sarcasm) , but actually it's quite frustrating, all of it, she told me today that she is the saddest person in the world because of it,
it makes me wonder,did she drink like this when you where little? If not then your lucky, its a pain I'm the ass to keep dealing with over and over again, part of the reason is because of you ya know, and me I guess, I just want it all to end you know? All the pain and suffering for everyone, but there are too many greedy people out there for that to happen, so it is but a fantasy.
I saw Gemini last night! I swear he gave me about a dozen heart attacks by jumping off the highest part of the bar things without a second thought, but he was ok, i was kinda scared hed get hurt, its weird he acts so much different in real life then on texting, he pissed me off slightly for a misunderstanding , he kept saying faget and I thought he was calling me it, so I may or may not have smacked him upside the head, a bit harder then I intended , (hehe oops ), I didn't mean to hit him that hard, and immediately regret it after words, I felt so guilty for the rest of the night, here I am telling everyone not to hurt him and what do I do!?! I swear I'm a fluffing idiot. We got along though to a point, but there wasn't fighting so I guess that's good, right?!? Oh god I hope he isn't mad at me, I asked him if he hates me,he said no, weird, I thought he loathed me ,strange I guess not,
The whole night I kept thinking about you, mom,and Lexi, I havent exactly heard from you since that one night since you came over, your starting to worry me 💚 I swear, I was worried about mom as well, she was slightly drunk, and if I'd keep my damn mouth shut about it I would be less worried about, have less attention towards myself, it would be kinda nice but NOPE that's not how my brain wants to work, kinda.
Lexi had me worried about things the most, saying I was selfish for going to the night games, but I'm not I just wanted to hang out with my friends, *sigh* idk what the hell is wring with me ,I shouldn't have told them what had happened, ...
We played truth or dare , that was fun, Gemini was stalling a bunch though, Lexi m had dared me to kiss him either on the hand or on the cheek, oh fluffing dear, he had fingerless gloves on and refused to take them off, so that was a nope, I had to go for the cheek, lovely right? , after we had a slight bow and arrow war between me him Mariyah and Lexi I had to do it , and I went for it after several times of re thinking it , I did it, just to get it over with , afterwords there was more of the nurf war and he got dared to kiss a hand of any girl in the room, I swear I didn't want him to have to do it to me if he didn't want to, but he did , he was "inspecting "my hand first, I swear he was trying to look for my cuts/ scars on my wrist as well,... then he went for it and went back to the others in the room, even though we where all within a 3 foot radius of each other , he has whipped off his lips afterwords but I didn't mind, I had put hand sanitizer on my hands afterwards so eh, and I dont think he wanted either to happen period.
Finally me Cassidy and Mariyah had to go home with cassidys dad and I got locked out a my house, I had to stay the night at cassidys,
And now I'm sitting on my bed writing this while waiting for it to be close to 5 so I can go to the councilors, I may or may not still need to read 3chapters of the book he assigned me... You know 💚 you've cause quite some trouble by not being here, but its ok, I forgive you, even though dad said I shouldn't, I still do,I miss you💚
Love 🍄💚
