Liebe lebt finnisch(done)

65) This is the end (2)

Jede einzelne Sekunde spielte sich in Zeitlupe ab, als ich aus dem Auto stieg.

Ich schluckte, bevor ich fragte: ,,What are you doing here?"

Meine Augen schauten auf den Boden; ich wagte es mich nicht, in seine Augen zu schauen.

,,Can I talk to you? In your house?"

,,I guess that's not a good idea."

,,Please, I need time to talk to you."

Plötzlich spührte ich seine Hand auf meinem Oberarm und ein stechender Schmerz durchzog meinen Arm.

Sofort zog ich ihn weg.

,,We said everything we needed to say."

,,I don't think so, Julia and you know it. You know it deep in your heart."

,,It's over, Samu! It never even started! It's your fault, why this is all so fucked up!"

,,Don't say that, please..."

,,But it is the truth and you can't stand it! You killed me and you killed my baby! You don't even know, how I feel. It's only my body, what's left of me. I'm empty inside. You broke my heart, you lived in there!"

Samu schluckte und ich bemerkte, wie sich seine Hände zu Fäusten ballten.

,,How dare you?! How dare you, saying such bullshit?! I know, that I haven't been the husband I should have been, but your words hurt like hell! It was also my baby, which died, and I know exactly, how you feel or do think I did party all day? I cried every night and I know you did too. I think, we should handel this together."

Ich schüttelte den Kopf.

,,Okay...I understand, why you don't love me, I don't love me either, so how could you?", sagte Samu.

Kurze Stille.

,,Why did you come? Everything was fine, till you came into my life. But I blame myself. I was stupid, and let you in my heart."

,,I'm sorry.", sagte er ruhig und ging zu seinem Auto.

Dann drehte er sich ein letztes mal um.

,,But I've got a last question: how do you know, that it's over?"

Ich spielte mit meinen Finger und schaute wieder auf den Boden.

,,Maybe when you feel more in love with your memories than with the person standig in front of you."

Ende.