Journal of a Teenage Muslim.

Chapter 56 - Make up, Fake up.

Maydah's Point of View:

"What happened?" Spencer asked as soon as I had come out

"He didn't say anything," I shook my head.

"Nothing at all?" Spencer asked curiously.

"Yes, nothing at all," I snapped. "Where's Chang?"

"He went to get doughnuts,"

I gave him a questioned look.

"You know, police eating doughnuts all day.... I thought it was funny," He said after looking at my blank face.

"Ok let's go," I said not bothering to smile at his joke.

"Maybe the officers might want to debrief you?"

"Nah, they'd be here if they wanted to do that."

"Ok.." Spencer said.

I woke up the next morning.. And surprisingly enough, even with all that had happened yesterday, I still managed to sleep like a baby! Until of course, four in the morning, than I was unable to even close my eyes with all the thoughts running through my head.

"No. No I don't trust you."

How sure he had sounded when he said that. But it shouldn't surprise me. It was quite obvious he didn't trust me, he never told me what he'd been up to, what was going on in his life, the reasons behind his actions...

"I think you look disgusting."

I had been called ugly so many times.. But that was by Hailey, Alicia, and the rest of the girls. This time it was different. Zeke was a guy.

No guy had ever commented on how I look apart from teasing me about my Hijab if they'd ever bother to pay attention. To be honest, most of the guys at school really couldn't care less about me and I liked it that way.

Hearing your ugly from a girl.. That's just normal.. Expected even.

But a guy? And the guy had to be Zeke?

I looked at myself in the mirror. It's true I was no beauty queen.

My body was slim and tall and curved only slighly. My hair looked like a bird's nest unless I combed it properly. My eyes were a simply shade of honey brown and looked to big for my face. My nose, I don't even know how to describe a nose but it was nothing like Hilary Duff's nose.

And the more I stared at myself, the more I saw... I was disgusting.

My lips were pale pink not cherry red. My cheeks were colorless not rosy. My eyelashes weren't thick enough....

I went downstairs as the sun was beginning to light up the house. I went to the basement where my mom's old stuff were and found her makeup set. I guess this was the only way I would look 'nice'.

I finished getting ready for school, and that included applying the makeup. I rushed downstairs and decided to leave quickly before Dad catches me. He never said anything about not wearing makeup but he might still ask me why I was wearing it and I didn't want to answer any questions.

Too bad that didn't go as planned.

"Maydah," Dad called as my hand reached for the doorknob.

"Yeah?" I said still facing the door.

"You do know how very observant I am right? Espicially when it comes to you,"

I sighed.

"Come here," He said.

"Dad, every one wears makeup and I can't be the only one not wearing it and-"

"Slow down kid." He chuckled. "No one said anything about not wearing it."

"So I can go?" I said cheerily.

"Sit.."

I sat down, unsure what Dad was going to say next.

"First of all, I want you to know that you are not every one else." He started.

"I know but I can't be the only odd one out." I said.

"I know, my dear, but just listen to me."

I nodded for him to continue.

"You need to be comfortable with who you are, in the person that you are and in the way you look and in what you do... Tell me Maydah, are you comfortable with yourself?"

"Dad I'm ugly." I said smugly.

"Since when has this idea entered your head?" He questioned sharply.

"Since I looked at myself in the mirror."

Dad shook his head. "Officer Chang told me you went to see Zeke and left almost immidiately after,"

"Yeah," I shrugged. "I guess I should have told you I was going but-"

Dad held up his hand to stop me, "What did he tell you?"

"Who Chang?" I played dumb, "He said-"

"Maydah," Dad shot me a sarcastic look.

"Oh Zeke.." I muttered. "Umm, he wouldn't tell me anything about the - about the crime.."

"Well he must have told you something.."

I kept quiet, looks like Dad really did know everything..

"He said I look disgusting." I said finally.

"And you mean to tell me because he said it, you're going to believe?" Dad asked.

"Dad.. It's complicated."

"Not really..."

"Ok, I guess your right.. Because he pointed it out, I've never paid attention to the way I look until he pointed it out." I conceded.

"He is an absolute jerk Maydah. You should only be listening to one guy in your life and that's me," Dad grinned. "And I'm telling you, you're more beautiful than a glowing diamond.. With out all that makeup."

"Thanks Dad," I smiled.

"I've got to get to work." Dad said checking his watch. "I'll see you later kid."

"Later Dad."

I got up and went to the bathroom and looked at myself. Dad was right, all this makeup wasn't me. I washed it all off, I was comfortable with myself the way I was, with out makeup..

Zeke Daniels, I'm perfect just the way I am. Love it or leave it.

I was walking to school when I felt a cold hand cover my mouth so I wasn't able to scream. I lifted my hand to punch the person away but suddenly felt so tired.

So.. soo.. sleepyy...