The Chamber [Sequel to Silence]

27

 I couldn’t move. My limbs refused to work. The whole time I lay there in my bed, Antonia tried to coax words out of me. But my tongue was knotted. I felt like Raven. Helpless, and silent. I was tired, but I refused to allow myself to sleep. I knew that if I did, I’d dream of her.

 Riley…

 A sob wracked my body. Every limb on my body, every heartbeat I had, every breath, hurt. It was as though someone was ripping me apart. And the whole time, I couldn’t take Riley out of my mind. I saw her falling, forever falling, and I couldn’t breathe, my chest crushed, my heart collapsed. Antonia gave up eventually, just lying beside me, her hand in mine. I closed my eyes, willing the pain to stop. I wished I’d never met Riley Swan. I wished I could take back all the amazing memories we shared. Because losing her completely was better than losing her after having spent time with her. I’d had a taste of the Whirlwind’s world, and when she was gone, it left me wondering how I could ever have been happy before I met her. I wanted to be numb. But I felt. I felt a lot.

 There was a knock at the door. When I failed to answer it, Antonia got up to open the door. She made a quiet exchange with whoever was there and then shut the door. When she returned to my side, she had something in her hand. An envelope.

 “Arrian? You might want to see this. It’s from Riley,” she said. I stiffened. Her name was like a stab the heart. An image of Riley flashed to my mind, of her lying in the mud in the arena, Elianna coaxing her to open her parachute. I felt the pain she’d experienced. But I allowed Antonia to help me sit up, my body heavy like I was soaked in water. She opened the letter for me, my hands trembling too much to do it myself. Then she stroked my hair lovingly.

 “I’ll wait outside, give you some privacy. Call me if you need me,” she said softly. She kissed my head “I’m sorry,” she said. Then she left, and my eyes managed to focus on the paper. It had huge scrawled writing on it and took up several sheets of paper due to this. Riley’s handwriting was so indicative of her personality, practically leaping off the page. I smoothed out the paper on my bed and began to read.

 My dearest Ari,

 If you’re reading this, it means I’m dead. Pow. That wasn’t a nice sentence. It feels strange, writing this, not knowing if you will ever read it. I don’t want you to be reading this. But if you are, I thought I should let you know that I love you. My brother. My friend. My mentor. If you’re reading this, I don’t want you to blame yourself for my death. Chances are I will die being too reckless, or at the hands of someone stronger than I, and that isn’t your fault. I want you to remember me fondly, how I was when we were together. We had fun, right? It’s been great. And I can die happy in the knowledge that during my time in the Capitol, I discovered how to make the most of what I have. I fell in love (if you haven’t guessed by now, I’m head over heels for Milo. Paws off, that hottie is  mine) and I made friends in the most unexpected circumstances. Isn’t there just something so magical about that?

 Time is short, my friend. I hope that should you read this, you will find some way to celebrate my passing on. Go start a rebellion for me. And if Otto is alive, make sure he pays for being such an evil little bastard. OK? And another thing. Don’t you dare let Pandora go. You’d better marry her, hang on to her, because I want you to be happy. And I know she makes you happy.

 Remember me, yeah? I’ll be watching. No, scrap that. I’m going to haunt you for the rest of your days. You’ll be seeing a hell of a lot of me. This isn’t over. Not until the fat lady sings, eh?

 Remember. Riley Swan will have the last laugh.

 Love from The Whirlwind, Destroyer of Worlds.