Impact (H.S. AU) (COMPLETED)

29 * NO PEACE * 29

JESS

I stand in front of my dresser, gripping the edge of the wood with white knuckles. I look into the mirror, staring into my own bloodshot eyes. I don't know if I can do this. I look at the dangly diamond earrings in my ears and the giant necklace across my chest, all of it borrowed from Eliza.

My hands are clammy, shaking against the wood I'm leaning on, holding myself up on. I can feel the tears threatening to spill over my cheeks, but I breathe in, keeping them at bay in order to not mess up the makeup Sam just finished putting on my face. I dab under my eyes, my red lips trembling as I grab my purse and slide it over my shoulder.

I catch sight of myself in the full-length mirror by the door, the red dress fitting me perfectly in all the right places. My heels match it perfectly. I almost look like myself, the most myself I've looked in weeks. My hair is shorter and more purple than red. Every time I saw it in the mirror it reminded me of him and how much he loved it, so I cut it off and dyed it. Sam said I was being rash, but I felt ages better after I did it.

I run my fingers down the red satin fabric of my dress as I slide my arms through my long black peak coat jacket. I look like a million bucks as I stare at myself in the mirror but inside I still feel empty. I'm wobbling on my heels, it feels like a single gust of wind could knock me over.

I know he'll be there tonight, he has to be. It's the night before the trip, the big company dinner to celebrate the new San Francisco location of Styles Publishing. My stomach feels sick as I head out the door and to my car. I can't imagine seeing him again, not after the wedding party. I didn't realize how horribly it would mess with my mind, how fast it could hinder my breathing.

I pull out of the parking lot and collect myself as I drive, following my GPS to a convention center down Seminole street. I park outside amongst a sea of BMWs and get out of the car, wobbly walking to the front doors. I'm greeted by staff in suits who offer to take my jacket, but I tuck it tighter against myself and push passed them.

I'm already on edge, looking around at the countless faces I don't recognize. A waiter approaches me with a platter of champagne flutes and I take two from the tray before he even asks if I'd like one. I down one of them in two sips and leave the empty glass on the table behind me. I hope it numbs me soon, flowing through my veins and making my head stop spinning.

I sip through the second glass, savoring the smooth taste as I walk around uneasily, searching anywhere and everywhere for just one familiar face. I hope to run into Lex or Vance soon as I position myself in one of the corners of the room and look out amongst the sea of people bustling around.

Suddenly, my eyes land on Audrie at the other end of the room. I spring up from my solemn position on the wall and walk to her, as fast as I can in these god forsaken heels. She smiles as I walk up to her, taking me in her arms and giving me a squeeze.

"So, you're coming with us then?" She asks excitedly.

"I am." I sigh, trying to sound as eager as I can.

"Why the change of heart?" She asks quizzically.

I don't have the heart to tell her that it's because Harry ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it with his stupid pair of boots. That every time I see him, my chest cavity feels like it's collapsing and suddenly I can't breathe let alone work.

"I don't have plans after school," I say thoughtfully, "This seems like a pretty good plan."

She nods, taking a drink of champagne from her own glass. She looks gorgeous too, standing in simple pumps with a white cocktail dress. It contrasts against her tanned skin beautifully, she looks effortlessly perfect.