Playboy's Principle (Playboy Series #1)

Chapter 21: Complete

I never thought that life would be hard as this.

Kung noon palagi kong sinasabi sa sarili kong kaya ko pa now i have no strength to fight for what i have. I found myself giving up.

And it kind of help me. A little.

"Ate kain ka muna." Sabay lahad sakin ng plato na puno ng pagkain ni Xantine.

After that confrontation with Jasper i immediately went put his pad. Ilang araw ko siyang iniwasan until i decided to go home in my Aunt's place.

Atleast dito walang Jasper na gugulo sa puso at isip ko.

"Salamat Xan."

"Ate bakit bigla kang umuwi?" Agad niyang tanong.

Kasi naman nagulat siya kaninang umaga paglabas niya ng kwarto. She didnt expect to see me here. Gusto ko kasi silang isurprise and i did it well. Halos nga malaglag ang panga niya nang makita ako.

Never ko kasing naging option na umuwi since the time i got my own pad. Kasi alam kong tatawag lang palagi sina Mommy samin to check on us. Atleast sa pad ko i have a lot of excuses not to answer their calls.

"Lets just say i missed the most stubborn sister in the world." biro ko sakanya.

She just rolled her eyes.

"Tss. Akala ko kasi nakalimutan mo na kami. Pero okay din yun. Para naman ikaw yung bumisita samin dito. Nakakatamad kayang bumyahe papuntang pad mo!" Reklamo niya.

"Oo na." Then ginulo ko ang buhok niya.

"By the way ate, uuwi daw sina Mommy sa Graduation mo!" She blurted.

Natigilan naman ako.

"You know that's a bad joke Xantine." I coldly said.

"Ate seryoso ako. They called last week and they are so excited. Biruin mo yun double celebration. You graduation at the same time your birthday. Isnt it amazing?"

Hindi na lang ako nagsalita.

You cant blame me if im not excited. Sa buong buhay ko i had never experience living with my parents. They all do is work. Sabi nila para din daw yun sa future namin but what it gotten us? Especially me.

After a few chit chats with my sister i decided to head in the kitchen. There i saw my Aunt Claire cooking sonething for lunch.

Kapatid ni Mommy si Aunt Claire and basically magkamukha sila. I actually found a mother's love on her. Halos siya na kasi ang nagpalaki samin ni Xantine. She meant the world to us.

"Hi Tita. What are you cooking?" I asked.

"Ofcourse ang favorite niyong dalawa. Roasted rosemary chicken and mac n cheese." Sabi niya at tumawa.

Napatawa na lang din ako.

"Uhm tita is it true?"

Napatingin naman siya sakin.

"Well mukhang nasabi na sayo ni Xantine. Oh sweetheart theyre your parents! Syempre uuwi sila sa graduation mo."

"Its not that naman tita eh."

Napatigil si Tita sa ginagawa niya.

"Then what is it?"

I smiled bitterly.

"All my life ive grown into this... i dont know, 'girl who doesnt know where to go' and sometimes i blame them for that. Kasi tita ang gusto ko lang naman eh kumpleto kami. That in every christmas, thanksgiving and birthday we were in a round table eating dinner. Dad putting up some crappy jokes and mom serves up her apple pie for dessert."

Then my eyes start ro heat up

"Pero hindi eh. They chose to leave us. Sometimes i dont know how to look at them anymore. Parang kulang. All i want is that theyre here, beside me... in every step i face my life. Sometimes i dont even know who i am anymore. Who i live for. Because in this life its worthless without someone who cares about you in the way you wanted to be."

I paused in a few and found myself bitterly laughing about it.

Naramdaman ko na lang na niyakap ako ni Tita. And it is one of the safe place i wanted to be.

"Zafrina, i know im not that mother you wanted to have but i just want to say that no matter what happens im always here to care and love you." She said.

Sa ilang araw na pagiging miserable ko i gusss that was ths greatest thing i heard.

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"Zafrina ijah kain lang ng kain ha im sure namiss mo ang luto ko." Sabi ni Tita.

Talagang kumain lang ako ng kumain. Ang sarap magluto ni Tita since forte niya ang cooking. At namiss ko din ang mga lutong bahay, minsan lang kasi ako nakakatikim nun kapag nasa pad ako. I have no time to cook for myself.

Masaya kaming kumakain na tatlo nang biglang may kumatok sa pinto. Nagpresinta akong ako na ang magbukas.

Ganoon na lang ang gulat ko nang makita kung sino ang nasa labas.

"Z-zafrina"

"Mommy..."

Halos pabulong kong sabi.

Agad niya akong niyakap ng mahigpit doon ko na lang din napansin na nasa likuran niya si Daddy na halos mangiyak iyak din akong makita.

"I missed you anak. Im sorry... im sorry for everything." She cried.

At that point hindi ko na rin napigilang hindi umiyak.

Kahit anong galit at tampo ko sa parents ko it didnt change the fact that i still love them. Afterall theyre my family.

"Mom..." pareho kaming napalingon kay Xantine na gulat na nakatingin samin.

Kumalas si Mommy sa pagyakap sakin at at na nilapitan si Xantine para yakapin.

Lumapit naman sakin si Daddy at niyakap din ako.

"I miss you Dad." Sabi ko.

"Me too sweetheart. Daddy misses you so much."

After that emotional scene ay halos hindi na kami mapaghiwalay na apat. We talk all night of different stories of what happened this past few years. Hindi mawala ang mga ngiti sa itsura naming lahat. After all this years naramdaman ulit namin ni Xantine gow to be loved and it felt good.

"Im happy that youre all finally together." Biglang sabi ni Tita nang pumunta ako sa kitchen para kumuha ng tea.

I just smiled..

"I never felt happy like this before Tita."

"I know, atleast you finally have what you want. Well... kung yun lang ba talaga ang gusto mo."

I kind of confuse sa sinabi ni Tita but then i realized what she is talking about.

"Tita--"

She cut me.

"Alam kong wala akong lugar sa sabihin sayo to but Zafrina i just want to say... follow what your heart wants."

Hindi ko alam kung paano ni Tita nalaman ang tungkol dito pero sana nga...

Sana makaya ng puso kong ipaglaban siya.