The Problems in Life. Book One: Helpless (Completed)

Chapter Seventeen

Ash has been different since that night. When he's around me he seems distant, like he's not really here with me. He sits with me on the bus, but he doesn't say much. I text him, but he gives one word replies.

I decided to go to his house after school. I haven't been to his place since that night. I asked Derik if he could drive me there, and he agreed. I gave him a quick kiss before getting out of the truck. Derik said that he had to take care of something, and to text him when I was ready to go home.

I'm standing here on Ash's front steps, watching Derik leave. I turn around and knock on the door. Nothing. I turn the knob and the door opens. Ash almost never remembers to lock the door.

I find Ash in the kitchen getting himself an snack. "Hey Ash," I say quietly and he practically jumps out of his skin.

"Amanda!" He exclaims. "What the hell are you doing here!?"

"Why do you sound pissed?" I ask a little confused. "I thought you would be happy to see your best friend slash sister."

"You could have let me know that you were coming over," he says sounding even more pissed. "Why are you here?"

"I want to know what's up with you," I say crossing my arms. "Why have you been ignoring me?"

"I haven't been ignoring you!"

"Yes you have! I try to talk to you and you barely say two words! I try to text you and all I get is an one word reply!"

"Maybe if you weren't with your boyfriend all the time-"

"I'm not with him all the time! I tried to sit with you at lunch and you pushed me away! I called you to hang out with Hayley and me the other night, and you said that you were busy!"

"Maybe because you ignored me when I needed you most! Maybe I don't want to be your friend anymore! MAYBE I AM DONE WITH YOU! I HATE YOU!"

I can feel tears streaming down my face. Ash hates me. He just said that he hated me. My best friend, my brother, hates me and wants nothing to do with me. I can feel my heart breaking. I want to shout something back at him. I want to say that I hate him back, but I can't. I can't say anything.

"Amanda-" he says softly.

"Don't," my voice cracks. "Just don't."

I turn around and start making my way to the door when Ash grabs my arm. "Amanda-"

"Just leave me the fuck alone," I whip around and snap at him. I pull my arm away from him and run outside. I slam the door behind me and sit on the front steps. I pull out my phone to call Derik when I see Ash's name.

I could delete him. I could forget about him and move on with my life, but something's holding me back. I can't do it. Ash means too much to me.