Tapout

Scream.

Chapter 45

Lucas' Point of View

"WHERE THE FUCK IS SHE?!" It's fucking 4 o'clock in the morning and she hasn't come home.

"Luke, calm down. She's probably just clearing her head. She can take care of herself."

"NO! She isn't supposed to fight Josh. She isn't, she won't." I don't tell him but she wouldn't risk forgetting me again. It tears her up how this whole situation has panned out. I can't believe I said that to her. I can't believe I made her run. Riley would remember me if she could, I know she would. We've spent the entire fucking week, listening to my stories and reading her journal. I know she wants to feel for me the way I feel for her.

I'm such a fucking idiot. I rub my eyes that are red from zero sleep and crying. It's a fun little mixture. I don't deserve her. I don't. It's selfish of me to push myself on her, but she wants me there. Right? She's asked me to stay the night, she told me she likes me, she initiated about half of our kisses.

"She'll fight if necessary Lucas."

I snatch my keys and slip on my boots. "I'm going to look for her again."

"Lucas! Stop! You've driven all over this fucking town, you and I both have. She obviously doesn't want to be found." Then why do I have an awful feeling?

"She doesn't know this town. What if she just doesn't know how to get back? To her, she's been here for a week and most of that has been spent here or at school. So, I'm fucking going and don't try to stop me."

Josh grabs his truck keys, "I'm going with you. You go right, I'll go left." After zipping up my jacket I saunter towards my truck and turn right. If anything happens to Riley I swear to fucking God, I can never forgive myself. I ruined our date, I ruined it by pressuring her to tell me what she was thinking. Riley didn't tell me what she was thinking for a reason because she doesn't want it to happen. She is a take action person, if she wanted it to happen Riley would have told me.

My Riley.

I can't let her go. I won't, I won't let her push me away. No matter how much it hurts.

I remember holding her before the date.

Just hold me.

Some of my favorite words since she woke up. I learned when to keep my mouth shut when she's emotional. Riley has cried more this week than I've ever seen her cry, I don't know if that's just from the accident or if she's so truly frustrated that she's mad at herself. I think after tonight it is the latter. I so badly want to make her feel better, I want to kiss her tears away, hold her through the pain and love her. I reminisce to the first night home from the hospital.

"You need to get some rest sweetheart."

"Shut up. I'm fine. I want to hear more stories." It was evident she could barely hold her eyelids open.

"That's why you're so tired, your mind is running a million miles a minute trying to process everything." Her gorgeous doe eyes rolled, and her head landed into the pillow. I cringe at her carelessness, yes it is just a damn pillow but it only makes me wonder what else she does. I pull the comforter over her beautiful body and kiss her forehead. "Good night sweetheart. Call me if you need me."

"Where are you going?" I furrow my brows and glance towards the beautiful specimen of a woman. Does she want me to-really? "Stay."

"Are you sure?" I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable, I mean to her we just met yesterday.