Say The Words (Louis Tomlinson Fan Fic)

Chapter 22

Please read what follows below, it's pretty important to me :) love you, thanks.

Guys, this girl @red_gb has an amazing story going. The only problem she has is.... THERE'S NOT ENOUGH READS ON IT! It's such an intense story and the storyline is so interesting and different. It's way way way too good of a story to not have everyone reading it. Her story that I'm talking about is Underneath It All and please please go check it out!

Here's chapter 22.... I need ideas for where this story is going... and I'm thinking that it'll either be a super long book or a series.. Please let me know your thoughts about this! Don't just say "You're a good writer!" "I love this story" tell me what you like about this story. Most of all: I need inspiration, ideas, and suggestions! Thanks for reading my long message if you did!

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*Addie's POV*

Tuesday, November 12th, 2013

"I'm sure. I feel under the weather a bit, I'd much rather just go go bed." I tell Jen, Bradley, and Mason as they ask about what to make for dinner.

Mason's hesitant. Ever since the incident with my attempt, the hospital, and my short time at rehab Mason has been watching me closer than the secret service watches the president-- too closely. If he found out I'm still cutting and struggling to keep food down- let alone, eat, he'd send me back to rehab single-handedly with no hesitation.

I avoid Mason's gaze and walk to my room. "Goodnight, babe!" Jen calls. I mumble a goodnight and enter my room, closing the door behind me.

I go to my bathroom. Sulking, slow, sloppy steps I make, dragging my life in a body bag behind me. It is 6:07 pm.

I look in the mirror at what exactly I've become.

Cutter

Freak

Mad

Mental

Cold

Numb

Ghostly

Skeletal

Tears well up in my eyes. I take off all of my clothes except for my black bra and matching underwear.

Examining my body, my little fingers trace over my cuts and scars. They are speed bumps to my fingertips. Then my fingers trace over my body, yearning to feel every bone I possible can.

Once I'm done feeling sorry for myself, I throw my clothes in my hamper and head to my room to put on a sweatshirt and shorts.

After putting on my girl boxer shorts, I take off my bra and put a sports bra on. So comfy.

Walking to my closet, I remember one sweatshirt I especially like and look for that one. I notice that it's not inside my closet. I had a box of clothes that I hadn't put away yet from the move. I haven't had the energy to, so I decide to look for it now.

I go through my clothes box and see that it's not there. Then, I check another box and find it. I remember that I wasn't supposed to have this sweatshirt. I only found it in my room folded up after he left. After Louis left. He left it on the bed for me to keep. I never wanted to wear it though. Along with the sweatshirt, I see some pictures. Some in picture frames, some not. I take his sweatshirt and slip it on. It still smells like him. When I pull it down, a note falls out of the sweatshirt. I sit down and unfold it.

Adelaide,

Hi babe. I'm about to leave for my flight and you don't know that I left you my sweatshirt. But, now you do because you're reading this note.

I'll love you forever. Tears prick my eyes.

I hope you can be all right while I'm gone. I hate leaving you and not knowing if you'll be all right. You are such a strong woman. I believe you can overcome anything. If you can't conquer these things for yourself, do it for me. I won't rest peacefully until I know that you are well. Healthy and happy. I've never truly wanted the best for someone more than I do for you. I don't know if that makes sense, but I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.

A tear pours down my cheek and on my knee.

Don't think of me leaving, because we'll be together soon. I'll visit you and maybe someday we'll get a house together. I'll let you pick it out. You can have all the say in the world. I will do anything to make you smile. I miss you already, my beautiful girl. I'll talk to you soon, love. Sleep well.

Louis

I throw the note on the ground and crawl to my bedside. I lift myself up and scream into the bed covers. That being the only energy I have, I get in bed and pull the covers over myself.

I sob and I sob.

Louis didn't want me. Well who would? I'm fucked up. I'm fucking obese. I can't eat without panicking in my head. I mean, normal people don't do that. Louis wants a normal person. Now he has one, Eleanor. She's pretty and skinny. Her happy personality. She likes Louis. He's got the perfect girl and they're probaby going to get married one day. He won't get married to me. Nobody wants to marry a psychopath. Nope. Nobody wants me.

Nobody wants me.

Nobody needs me.

I'm the clutter of a messy house.

I make everything worse.

I'm a failure.

I burden every living soul on this damned planet.

After a while of letting my mind run and run, I finally start to stop sobbing and calm down. I check my phone and the time is 11:03. I've been crying in my pitch black bedroom for at least 2 hours. How sad and pathetic is that?

I hear my door open and I pretend to be asleep. Someone walks in and closes my door behind them. I hear them walking closer to my bed. I hear something hit the floor and I assume it's a phone. The person sighs and I feel the bed dip inward. I gasp and start to turn over. "Shhh, it's just me, Bradley," Bradley says. He gets in bed and puts his arm around me. "C'mere, love. You wouldn't stop crying."

I whimper and give in and turn over to snuggle into Bradley. He's warm and has a nice, different scent. Maybe a new cologne, but I really like it. I wrap my arms around him and start to fall asleep and say, "I hate sleeping alone."

"Me too."

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You guys have no idea how badly I wanted to bring Louis back in this chapter. GAH.