Baby's Breath

Chapter 18: denial's end

My head bumped into the glass as Rick wrenched the car onto the shoulder, vibrating every cell in my brain. I grit my teeth, my hand anxious on the handle, waiting for the right moment. As soon as Rick slammed the car into park, I was out and marching as fast as I could for home.

"Jess!" Audra's feet pounded on the gravel, her voice washing away from the zooming traffic. Cars whooshed passed us 80 mph, blowing my hair behind my shoulders. The little rocks and debris poked the tender soles of my feet and I winced, but I kept my head up anyway. "I have your shoes, wait, Jessica!"

But I kept right on. The sky was dark and sparkly with stars, the moon bright overhead. Why? Why? If only I could run. My body betrayed my desire to outrun Audra and everything that went on in that little car as it became sluggish and faint. had to read twice to remember it was her body that was sluggish and faint

Chills scurried along my arms as she grew closer. She was angry. "Jessica! Stop right there. You owe me an explanation!" When I didn't turn, she grabbed my shoulders and spun me. "What is the matter with you?"

I clamped up, my hands easing the chills from my upper arms. A thousand words dammed my brain, flooding my mouth with confusion. Not wanting to deal with her—or anyone for that matter—I turned back around. I wanted to scream, to hit, to bite.

"Jessica, I am talking to you!" Her hand clutched my shoulder again and whirled me to face her. As graceful as my clumsy body allowed, I tried to move fluidly with my momentum, but my foot hooked behind my ankle. I shrieked and down I came. A pair of glaring headlights reflected off of brilliant green glass and I wailed as it sliced into my palm.

Hot pain shot lightning up my arm, into my neck, and down my spine. A door slammed and heavy footfalls chased us down. Strong arms lifted me, carrying me back to the car. "What were you thinking? Why'd you push her?" I realized then that Josh wasn't talking to me, but to Audra.

"I didn't push her. She lost her balance and fell."

I was furious with everyone and their blatant insensitivity toward me. Audra with her persistence with Josh, Josh for everything he put me through, and my emotional upheaval.

"Man, this sucks." Rick heaved a sigh. The car lurched forward and we were on the move again.

Though I sat against the car door cradling my arm, Josh managed to grab and pull it to him. "Turn the light on." His voice was firm, commanding. I had every intention of jerking free from him, but when the light flicked on, I could only stare at my arm. Dark blood spilled from my hand, a bit of green sparkling glass still lodged in there. "Don't look. I'm going to remove the glass. Audra, give me the napkins from the glove compartment."

My flood of anger ebbed with Josh's simple touch, how he fussed over my wound with such gentleness; I couldn't help but gravitate toward him. It reminded me of that one night and I stiffened in his hold.

"Hey, Rick, take us to the hospital, this looks bad," he said as he applied pressure.

"No!" I vaulted from his hold and into my seat. Apprehension ripped through me and I could already see the nurses probing my belly. "Just take me home."

"But you'll need stitches," Josh argued as he buckled his seatbelt in place. "Here." He held the napkins out and shook them. Some dislodged from his grip and fluttered to the floor.

I grimaced, snatched them from his fist, and pressed them to my wound with a death grip. "No hospital," I growled. As crazy as it sounded, I was glad this happened. I was off the hook on having to tell Josh. I'd been so tense, my body relaxed so completely, that I felt so fatigued.

By the time we arrived home, and from what I could tell, the bleeding had stopped. Dad's car looked innocent enough in the driveway, but my wound would give me away. With Dad, I predicted that it would be a pain having to think of an explanation that would lead to another explanation, and another.