spacenames- phan chat room AU☆

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When Dan Howell woke up the next morning, instead of feeling excited for what the day had to come, he felt dread.

He'd be leaving to go home early tomorrow morning.

Naturally, this brought him down like hell. Phil tried everything to lift his spirits, taking Dan out to Starbucks in the morning, giving him small butterfly kisses all around his face when he had a deep frown.

But Dan couldn't seem to shake himself out of it, he just couldn't handle how upset it made him. The fact that he had to leave, to be alone again, not only scared him, but saddened him too.

And by sad, I don't mean the stereotypical type of sad. He wasn't moping, lying around, or hysterically sobbing every other hour.

When you think about it, referring to something as "sad" sounds so childish, like something flimsy, something one should be able to cast off with a happy reflection or the smile of a friend. But "sad" is nothing of the sort. It sits inside like the germ seed of depression, just waiting for the right conditions to grow, to send out roots to choke the hope out of your heart.

It is the trough in which we struggle to return to the peak, always afraid that this time the rungs will be too slippery, too far apart or simply not there at all.

Dan Howell felt like that type of sad.

The hopeless kind.

He couldn't exactly render why he felt so useless. Sitting in a cab, headed out to lunch. Phil occasionally nudging him and smiling, whispering sweet things into his ear, trying everything he could to make Dan feel better.

Dan wished he could just pull it together and smile for Phil, be a good sport for him, but he just couldn't. The fact that he had to leave so soon just hung above his head, and wouldn't seem to go away.

But as they sat in silence (|-/) at the restaurant table, Dan poking at his burger somberly, Phil finally snapped.

He slammed his fist on the table, naturally causing Dan to jump, then making him bang his leg on the bottom of it.

"Ow! Shit, Phil, what the hell was that for?"

"Alright, listen here, Dan." Phil said, leaning towards him. "You need to stop being so..." He paused. "So.. this. I'm frankly quite sick of it. Yes, I understand, and I'm sad too, but why the hell spend our last day together being depressed? I have a really awesome plan for tonight, Dan, but I'm gonna need you to stop being.. Well. I need you to stop being like that and shape up a bit, okay?" Phil finished, taking a sip of his Coke.

Dan couldn't stop himself from raising an eyebrow. "like 'that'? What does that even mean?"

Phil sighed, rolling his eyes. "To be frank, (iero) yes. All of this is completely unnecessary. I hate to sound mean but I just really want our last day together to be great, okay?"

Dan studied Phil for a few moments. He seemed tense. Slightly frustrated, with his brow furrowed and lips scrunched.

He nodded. "Okay. Yeah. Alright."

And then Phil's frustration seemed to just drain out of him, and he grinned. "Perfect. Let's kick this days ass. If it's our last day together, let's make this count."

Dan nodded again, this time with a little more enthusiasm . "Let's do it. But quit making it sound like we're never gonna see each other in the flesh again, you twat." He laughed, taking a bite out of his burger.

Phil took another sip of his Coke, looking deep in thought for a second before snapping out of it. "Of course, right." Then shot him a crooked grin.

"So, what are we doing tonight?" Dan asked.

A mischievous grin grew on Phil's face. "Oh, you know. Stuff."

Dan groaned. "Is it a surprise?" He said, faking enthusiasm.

Phil winked. "You know it."

Dan sighed loudly. "I-"

"-Hate surprises." Phil finished for him, laughing at Dan's unamused glare.

"I know."