Show Me {Phan}

Chapter 17

The truck began its journey to Phil's college first. Dan squeezed Phil's hand and frowned in his direction.

They arrived and Dan began to help unload his boyfriend's belongings. Phil stopped Dan before he entered his new dorm, a hand on his chest.

"Give me something to remember you by?" Phil asked, leaning in for a kiss.

Dan kissed him back, "There's some other stuff for you in here." Dan lifted the box a bit to gesture for a hint.

Phil nodded before entering the dorm. It was tiny, and he shoved his few boxes all over the place. As the movers set up his bed, he and Dan had some time to explore the campus.

They found a small coffee shop and went inside. Dan bought coffees for the both of them and sat down with Phil. Sipping their coffees, the two of them stared at each other sadly.

"I'll write," Phil said.

"And I'll reply," Dan said, smiling.

"I just... I wish you could stay here. With me," Phil said.

Dan nodded, "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too," Phil said.

They sat in silence for a bit, unable to think of words to say. When their coffees were empty they know it was time to leave. Back at the dorm, Phil gave Dan a hug, then pecked his lips.

"I love you," Dan said.

"I love you, too, Danny Boy. Just..." Phil stopped.

Dan looked at him, frowning, "Just what?"

"Don't forget about me," Phil blurted.

"Never," Dan promised, walking down the stairs. He offered a small wave, then disappeared.

Phil kept the door open, watching his love diaper. He stood there for a good few minutes, frozen.

"I love you..." Phil whispered, closing the door.

Dan got into the truck, buckling himself in. He stared out the window as Phil's dorm vanished begins them. Then he was alone.

There was a drive to get to his college. When they arrived, they moved Dan in. He looked around. Not a thing stirred in the tiny, bland dorm.

Almost instantaneously, Dan feel apart. Even if all of hours belongings we there, the one he belonged to wasn't. Phil was his world, and he was losing him in time.

He curled up in his bed sheets and cowered. He couldn't go outside, and maybe he doesn't want to be a lawyer.

What if I drop out? Dan thought. I could be with Phil... but we need to support a family some day. That choice was out of the question.

How could he be happy here?

Frowning, Dan pulled out his cell and called Phil by his contact. He made a note to remember his number.

"Hello?" Phil asked.

"Phil, I miss you," Dan blurted.

"Well, I miss you, too. But we've got to just try with this college thing, okay? Try to make some friends. It's important," Phil said, sounding as if he was hurt that Dan had called about the situation.

"Okay..." Dan whispered.

"I'll talk to you later. I'll write, okay?" Phil asked.

"Sure," Dan replied. "Love you."

"Love you, too, Dan," Phil said.

The line went dead.

Dan had thought Phil would have been the one taking the situation worse, but he had been wrong.

The next day he dragged himself out of bed and to his first class. It bored his half to death, and he suddenly realized something.

It was as if something snapped in him, and he needed to find a sketchbook.

After classes, Dan went to the store and stalked the aisles for a sketchbook. He wanted one, needed one. All his pent up feelings needed to be unleashed. They were attacking him, ripping him apart.

Finally, one caught his eye. His picked it up and rushed for the counter, grabbing a package of pencils on his way.

He entered his dorm and flopped on the bed, frantically opening the package as if he were addicted. He shouldn't have been, he knew. But the truth? He was. He was addicted to art, addicted to feelings.

Addicted to Phil.

The only fix was to draw it out. All of the pain he felt in leaving home, the joyous celebration of his engagement, and the mourning of his dreams spilled out onto the paper in lines and colours.

The time he'd spent on the drawings inside the sketchbook before was transfered to this one. Time went on and the most he heard from Phil were a fee texts and 'I love you's' over the phone.

The agony was building up, anger at the world, and more love for his fiancè. And it was all on paper.

Phil was in his dorm, on his laptop. He was managing an account for a particular site. It was how he'd contact Dan. Suddenly, he was pacing the floor in an attempt to ward off anxiety. Should I call Dan? Is he in class? Will he be mad? No, I shouldn't. But I want to... Ugh!

Phil plopped down on his bed and the words he'd spoken echoed in his mind, I'll write. He pulled out a piece of paper and began to scribble down some words. No, no, that won't do. That's an awful thing to say.

Phil sighed, crumpling the paper and tossing it at the trash. What would Dan say? Finally, the words came to him at once out of the depths of his mind and he wrote it. He wrote it all, then sealed it inside an envelope.

Then, remembering his agreement, he opened his laptop. Only a while had passed since he'd seen Dan, but he had already made a plan to contact him if he lost contact.

He was no longer just Phil Lester. Now he had an online identity. He had started a YouTube channel, and Dan could watch to see what he was up to. After he found it, that was. But that was only a part of it. When he posted videos, other people watched.

Within a few weeks he had several subscribers.

He was AmazingPhil.

{A/N: Chapter 20 will be the last, I'm sad to say. But, guys, if you want a sequel comment below! I really want to do one! Don't forget to vote and follow! Thanks for 440 reads, as well!!! <333 -Lion}