Why Wait?

47

I stayed in bed the next few days. I started to not feel well as soon as we left for New York. I throw up every time I even think about wanting to get up, my head feels like someone is clobbering at it with a hammer, and even though I want to eat, I can't bring myself to do so.

"Have you taken your meds?" Austin asks me when he comes in to find me still trying to sleep it off.

I  nod, not trusting myself to say anything without throwing up all over him.

He takes out his phone. "Then we are going to have to take you to the hospital," he says, running a hand over his face.

I shake my head into my pillow. "No," I groan.

"Kelli, if there's something wrong, we want to be able to figure out what it is now before it gets worse."

And that is how I ended up in the hospital. The doctor still hasn't told me what's wrong yet but I can tell by the look on Austin's face that it isn't good. His eyes are bloodshot and he refuses to leave my side, as if something bad is going to happen if he does. Alex and Luke came in a day later, looking slightly worse than my brother. And mom and dad came the next day.

"Miss Ross," the doctor says as Luke and I were playing a racing game on our phones. "Sorry to interrupt. May I speak with you for a moment?"

I nod, shutting off my phone. All the guys except for Austin leave the room. Mom and dad choose to stay in the room with us.

"Doctor, do you know what the problem is?" mom asks.

He nods, looking down at his clipboard. "When she explained the symptoms to me, I was curious because around here, those symptoms are pretty common. I thought, this is another one of those stories when a teenager gets pregnant." Austin's hand tightens around mine. "But, after looking through files and checking in with some of your other doctors, I realized that's not what it is at all."

"She's not pregnant?" dad asks, visibly relaxing.

"No," the doctor says and Austin loosens his grip on my hand a little. "But I am certain that after this, you will probably wish that were the case." He takes a deep breath. "Miss Ross, when was the last time you ate something?" he asks quietly.

I look up. "I don't know. About a week or so?"

He shakes his head. "With your condition, it has to have been about two weeks or so."

"And what's my condition?"

He claps his hands together. "This is the third time in two months you have come to the hospital. Though it isn't a drastic amount, it is still out of the ordinary. Looking through your files, I found that you have always been underweight, not by a lot, just a few pounds. You weighed one hundred and two pounds your last doctor's visit. You now weigh ninety-six. Now, the medically recommended weight for a girl such as yourself is one hundred and five pounds to one hundred and fifty pounds. The ideal weight for a girl your age is between one hundred twenty-four and one hundred thirty-two."

I catch Austin's gaze and see the disappointment in his eyes. My parents both look upset.

"And what does that mean?" I ask.

"It means, we all think you are battling anorexia. I have spoken with your family and some of your friends and more than once, I've heard them tell me you are insecure about yourself."

Not since Alex, I think to myself.

"I'm fine," I tell them, surprising myself with the amount of confidence in that one statement.

But, of course, they don't hear me. "I think it is best if you go to a dietitian," he says. "And continue going to therapy. Though what you do is up to you."

Mom and dad thank him but Austin just stays seated beside me, the hand that isn't holding pressed against his face.

"If you'll excuse me," the doctor says, leaving the room.

"Honey," mom starts.

I cut her off. "You don't really believe this, do you? I don't need a dietitian or therapy. I can just eat more."

"I think we all know that isn't going to happen."

I glare at her and she sighs. "We just want you to be okay, Kelli."

"That's a load of crap," I snap.

"Kelli," dad warns.

"I'm serious," I exclaim. "Neither of you were there when I injured my leg after volleyball, or when I was in a car wreck. None of you were there. And now, you're wanting to put me in therapy again just because a doctor told you to."

Dad frowns. "I'll admit we haven't been around much, but we do care about you."

"Do you love me?"

I can tell it took them by surprise. "What?" mom asks.

"Do you love me?" I repeat.

"That's not even a question," mother says. "Of course I do."

I look to dad. He is still just staring at me. "I want what is best for you," he reasons.

"That wasn't the question," I say harshly.

He dips his head in a nod. "I do. But love isn't going o keep us from trying to help you, if that's what you mean.

As if sensing the awkwardness in the situation, Austin finally speaks. "I think we should take a break. Let's not kill each other in a hospital."

The guys choose that exact time to walk in.

"Whoa," Luke goes, "I can sense the depression in here."

"Shut up," Ty tells him.

Mom and dad excuse themselves before going out the door.

"What happened?" Alex asks.

I look at him. "Did you talk to the doctor?" I ask him.

His eyes widen a little. "I didn't think he'd---"

"What did you say?"

"Kelli, don't drag him into this," Luke says softly. "He didn't have a choice but to tell the truth."

I feel the tears brimming at the corner of my eyes. "And what would that be."

"Look," Ty starts. "It's bad enough you're bipolar, Kelli. But you also have to deal with everything Cody made you go through. And we're sorry if we made you feel bad but we want to see you happy. And by telling the doctor the truth, we thought we were helping."

"What did you say?" I demand, going back to the original question.

Alex visibly gulps. "That you need help."

"Get out," I whisper.

"Kelli, I---"

"Leave," I tell them, my voice betraying me.

Austin runs a hand through his face. "You guys should go," he mutters.

"You too," I tell him.

"What? I am not---"

"Please," I plead. "You can come back in later. But I want to be alone right now."

Letting out a sigh, he nods, leaving the room with the guys trailing behind him.

Hey, guys!!! Sorry for lying to you guys! I absolutely realize how depressing this chapter is and I can't promise that Kelli will eventually come around but I still hope you liked it!

Any thoughts? Comments? Suggestions? I need a song for he last chapter!!!!

I will have the last chapter and epilogue and sequel info up sometime this weekend. Sorry if it takes forever!!

Thanks for reading!!!!!