Not So Secret

(31) Flashbacks: PT. 2

*Ethan's POV*

I watch Chloe closely as she searches her mind for things to tell me. I can't believe I just spilled out all of that shit. I hate talking about myself and my past and almost anything personal but I have to admit that actually felt good. I feel like a giant weight has been lifted off of my chest. Chloe was right, I need to talk about my feelings and thoughts.

"I honestly don't know where to begin. I guess for the most part I've always searched for that male security in my life that's why for the longest time I was so close to Josh because I felt as if he protected me." She finally begins and I stare into her sleepy eyes and listen close to her speaking.

"My dad wasn't really the lovey type. At least not to me but he certainly was to other women." She rolls her eyes, obviously still angered by this.

"Honestly I never had a dad until your dad became my dad. My "dad" wasn't a real dad. He's basically a sperm donor. It's not actually like he was sober enough during my childhood years to actually raise me. He'd get so fucking drunk he would beat the shit out of my mom. That's why she is the way she is and I know I get angry at her too much and I should be more understanding but it's hard because I remember the person she use to be and it hurts a lot ya know?" I nod and continue listening.

"God, I remember the nights I would be lying in my bed upstairs and hear them screaming and throwing shit. It was awful. I was so beyond happy and relieved when my mom finally grew the balls to get us out of that hell hole."

"What made her finally want to leave?" I ask her and she diverts her eyes, as if seeing the answer pop up in her mind.

"See this?" She leans her head back and raised her chin revealing a faded scar underneath her jaw. As many times as I've kissed her neck I have never noticed a scar even being there.

"What happened?" I ask her and she sighs.

"One night he got so drunk he could barely walk. He stumbled in the house and I was sitting there. I think I was about thirteen. My mom was at work and I was sitting in the living room watching a movie." She pauses and I brush the hair away from her face. She makes eye contact with me and I can see the hurt in her eyes.

"He got angry because I was in his seat and so he put on these brass knuckles and punched me right in the stomach and I was a little shocked you know? Like he had hit my mom before but he never ever hit me. All I remember was the room was spinning as I fell out of the chair and was gasping for air. When I stood up and finally could breathe again I punched him as hard as I could in the nose and let's just say he didn't like that very much. He then proceeded to give me an uppercut punch right to the jaw and it split my jaw open; almost shattering my jaw but luckily there was only a fracture." My eyes get wide and I imagine thirteen year old Chloe before me, blood rushing down her neck.

"The neighbors heard me screaming in pain and called the police because they knew of him beating my mom but my mom begged them not to call the police and convinced them she had it under control but when they realized he had hit me, they had enough. The police had shown up and I was lying on the floor at this point in excruciating pain. I couldn't breathe well and my jaw was bleeding so hard." I'm speechless as Chloe continues talking.

"They called an ambulance and they rushed me to the hospital. They tried to ask for my information but I couldn't speak. Luckily, my neighbor Mrs. Thomas, told them my name and told them everything. She even rode in the ambulance with me and called my mom. Turned out he had given me a broken rib as well as a fractured jaw. I just remember all the pain I felt rushing through my body and I remember seeing this giant bruise on my stomach like someone had just dropped a giant rock on my stomach."

"Wow," is all I can manage to say. I can't believe someone could be that cruel, especially to a little thirteen year old girl. What the actual hell.

"Then we met and I felt more safe around you than I did with Josh. I loved being with you and around you. I felt like I could conquer the world with you. I still do, actually." She smiles at me and I return it. She's so sweet.

"I would love to conquer the world with you Chloe Marie." I intertwine my fingers with hers and she smiles again, blushing this time.

"Ya know I was thinking, maybe this is why we were brought together. Maybe the universe felt as if both of us needed help but wouldn't receive it until we were in one another's lives. We have such a strong connection." Chloe speaks softly and I nod. All of that makes perfect sense to me.

"I want to go to therapy for you, Chloe. It'll be weird at first but I know I need it. It's obvious and I feel like maybe it'll help. I'm not saying you don't or can't help me but you know." I admit.

"Yes I understand, Ethan. That's great I'm glad you've decided that'll be best for you. Don't worry, I'll be there every step of the way with you." She pats my thigh and I nod, thinking it over.

"I can do anything with you by my side." I smile at Chloe and her eyes light up.

"Let's go get some dinner and end this week on a good note before I have to leave tomorrow." She grabs my hand and tugs me toward the door.

How did I ever get so lucky to have such a forgiving and loving woman in my life?