Letter #4

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Song: Habits by Tove Lo 

"Gotta stay high, all the time, to keep you off my mind."

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I remember your face the day you told me you were leaving and not coming back.

It was so emotionless, it was like you weren't even human.

But why, Grayson?

Looking back, I can see where we went wrong. You and your wandering eyes couldn't stand to look at me for more than a few seconds. 

And me, with my dreams and my romantic fantasies I had for us to last forever. Your laugh haunts my bedroom walls; at night, I can still feel your hands against my skin. 

Why did you tell me that you hated me and you never loved me?

Maybe I can't ever move on from you because we never got closure. We never said we're done, that there was no more us. 

You just walked away. With nothing. Giving me nothing. 

Maybe I can't move on because deep down I still think there's a chance. 

What fucking sucks is that I would take a bullet for you,

but you wouldn't even glance at me.

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