Never The Same ✔️[Completed]

Chapter 3

I woke up at the hospital and saw my sister looking at me with worry. "Jolene? Where were you." I mumbled, feeling my head hurt.

"I was here! I was always here, baby girl!" She said, crying into her hands. "No you wasn't. You weren't here. You weren't here to save me..." I said, referring to last night.

"Mamas, I saw you passed out on the floor of the bathroom, surrounded by a pool of your own blood, and according to the doctor, you aren't on your period! What the fuck happened to you last night, and tell me the fucking truth or I'm sending your ass back to mama and pops house! Speak!" She said, crying.

"I-I can't. Please understand. I need you to understand and just be there for me...no one can know." I mumbled, but then suddenly the doctor came inside with his clipboard. Wait, why it gotta be a nigga!

"Alright, so she has a small case of bipolar, but it can quickly escalate, so it's better to treat it early. I'm going to prescribe you with the daily pills she needs to take. Not only that, but her arm and wrist had cuts where most of the blood was coming from, so something tells me that she cut herself. You did say that you saw a safety pin in her hands when you found her, right?" The doctor asked Jolene making her nod her head and put her hand over her mouth and start to cry again.

"I think she may have tried to commit suicide. This doesn't look like a mistake since there are several lacerations." The doctor said, shaking his head.

Jolene quickly looked at him, and then me. "But...but why? Why?! Why would you do such a fucking stupid thing like that?! You know what could've happened in a world without you!? In a world with you dead?!" She yelled at me.

"Then I wouldn't be thinking about the pain! The pain I caused! It's all my fault! I can't take this!" I yelled before starting to cry and cover my face.

"What's your fault?! What'd you do?! You know we gon' get through, just tell me what happened! I ain't gon' tell mom if it's that serious, just tell me what you did!"

"I can't! I can't!" I yelled, now crying hysterically. The room was silent except for my loud cries.

"I'll go get the nurse to talk to her." The doctor said, leaving. Seriously, why'd it have to be a man that came into the room to be the doctor at a situation like this. I don't think that I'll be able to trust any nigga anymore. I'll never be the same.

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When the nurse came in, I politely asked Jolene to leave so I can talk to her alone.

"My name's Cathy Wells. What's yours, sweetie?" She asked in a soothing tone. That's almost the same question Oliver asked me when he first talked to me! I cried and mumbled, "Keisha...Keisha Jones..."

She rubbed my shoulder and said in her soothing tone, "Don't cry. Let's talk." I nodded my head and rubbed my eyes. I think I can tell her at least. I can't just keep it all boggled inside, and I doubt that she'll tell anyone.

"Alright, so what happened? Why'd you almost kill yourself? You can tell me. I won't tell. Promise."

"Ight...so...(cries) I...so it all started when my sister brought her man over. I was all skeptical and stuff, but I went upstairs cause I was hella tired. (Wipes eyes) Then I got into my Pj's and went to bed, but then there were knocks on the door so I opened it, and there was my sister's man. He told me that she left to get something and she'll be back later, , so he should look after me. I should've known then that he was lyin' cause she trusts me to stay in the apartment alone! Damn, damn! I'm so fucking stupid!" I yelled hitting my head.

"Hey, stop. Come on, we're just talking. No need to get physical with yourself. Let's continue talking. What happened when he told you that?" She asked, but something tells me that she knows what happened so far.

"He asked to come in, so I was like why and everything, but eventually I let his ass in! Why did I fucking let him in! Why!...(cries silently) why..."

"It's alright, sweetie, I'm here to listen and understand."

"Okay...(wipes tears)...so then after talking and everything, he closed and locked the door, which is strange cause why does a nigga gotta lock the door? But, I didn't think much of it. That's where I fucked up!" I took a moment to calm down before I continued.

"He started to strip his clothes, and right then I knew what he was trying to do and that I wasn't down for it. I went to the door to unlock and opened it, lying to him and saying that I gotta meet pops somewhere. Then he told me to stick around, but when I said that I really needed to leave while opening the door, he slammed it. He told me to stick around a bit more harshly and flung me to the floor...I don't want to get into much detail, but he...he...raped me. I was completely useless and weak! I couldn't stop him! What'd I do to deserve this shit! It's all my fault! It's all my fault!"

The nurse looked at me in shock even though I know that she had a hitch about what happened when I said I let him inside and started to cry. She put her hand over her mouth and said into it, "That's terrible..." I cried and yelled, "I know!" She hugged me and said, "It's not your fault at all! He's the one who did it to you! He chose to do it and you said no, right?" I nodded my head yes, wiping my tears.

"It's in no way your fault! You didn't ask for it, and it was uncalled for when he did it anyway. Did you tell your sister or go to the police?" She asked.

"Hell naw! He said that if I told, he finna hurt me and my sister! I ain't having that!"

"Well, until you're ready to speak, don't try to kill yourself again. I know that it must be hard for you right now, but don't kill yourself, and please don't blame yourself anymore or never forgive yourself. It's not your fault, it's his and remember that, okay? No matter what the circumstance were, it's his fault!"

"But, I let him in! I'm the one that let him do all that shit before finally realizing what he was really about to do!"

"That doesn't make it your fault! You didn't tell him to do it to you, right? And he's the one that didn't listen to you when you said no! No means no!" She told me sternly. I nodded my head yes, but actually, I feel like it is my fault. I probably led him on or something by staring into his eyes or something because that's when he started to act creepy and lock the door. But he seems older than me by a ton, like Jolene. Does that make him a pedo or just uncomfortably horny. Uncomfortable to me.

"Good, now are you ready to see the doctor?" She asked getting up from the chair.

"Yeah, but if you don't mind...can I get a female doctor, please," I asked feeling kinda embarrassed and nervous. Though, that soon disappeared when she nodded her head yes and said, "Of course, sweetie." I'm kinda relieved, but is this going to be the rest of my life? Being afraid of guys because I'm afraid that it'd happen again. I guess so. I can never get my old self back.

I silently cried into my hands at the thought of how I'll never be myself again.

~

A/n: Hey guys, so you made it to the end of the chapter. I want to here your thoughts on how you felt about this chapter? I'm sorry if every chapter makes you want to cry, but that's sort of the point so that you could feel and know what Keisha goes through?

Tell me, do you want me to give you tissues to clean your tears or pitchforks to chase Oliver for what he did to Keisha?

Anyways, don't forget to vote, add if you haven't yet, and stay tuned for more. Oh and I almost forgot to say comment because I read every single one of them!

--Lovely_girl_writer <333