The Choice -minizerk AU-

1

Simon's P.O.V.

Since the day that I met Josh I've had these feelings for him. I was never sure of what they were. I could have promised myself that I was straight. But Josh changed that all. He makes me go mad. I have no control over myself when I am around him. I like Josh, I really like Josh. But he has Freya. He wants to propose to Freya. I have to put on the act that I am happy for him, but the truth is, is that I wish that I was Freya. I wish I was the one who Josh loved. But I'm not, I'm just one of his friends, his bro, nothing more.

"Hey Simon, can you come with me to pick up the ring?" Josh asked as he came up to my door.

"Sure, just give me a sec, I have to finish this up." I said as he nodded and walked away.

He was beautiful. A masterpiece. One of a kind. Everything that I dreamed of. He was my angel sent from heaven. There to guide me. But I am slowly losing my angel. Everything is starting to crumble. I am all alone.

I got up and put on one of the sidemen sweatshirts and found him sitting in the kitchen looking at something on his phone.

"Hey what are you looking at?" I said sitting next to him trying to look over his shoulder.

"I'm trying to find a ring." He said laughing because of me acting like a child.

"Where do you think that you are going to find one? How will you know what's the right one? Are you sure Freya's the right one?" I asked as he just looked at me like I was mad.

"Okay, calm down with all of these questions. What do you mean am I sure that Freya is the right one? I love her." He said laughing.

I looked down at my hands as he just shoved me playfully, so I looked up giving a fake smile.

How can it all hurt so much? I am suppose to be happy for my friend. I'm so selfish.

"I don't know, I was just making sure." I said laughing, but not really.

Truly I was breaking on the inside.

"Come on." He said patting my shoulder.

Every touch gave me chills. During the game when I scored a goal, I will always remember the moment when he hugged me. He went out of his way to come and hug me. It made me feel special and brought butterflies to my stomach. But then when half time came and we went inside, Freya was there and gave him a hug and a kiss. He was overjoyed to see her. Something that I could never do.

I got into the car and saw a humongous smile on his face.

"What's up?" I asked looking at him laughing at his stupid smile.

"I can't believe after six years of being with her that I am going to propose. It's just so surreal." He said laughing as I stopped.

He pulled turned on the car and reversed out of the drive way. Slowly we drove to the ring shop blasting music and singing to it. He is the only person that I'm never afraid to do this with.

We reached the ring shop and he turned off the car.

I opened my door but he just sat there.

"What's up?" I asked as he just looked up at me with his beautiful eyes.

I never understood his eyes. At one moment they were a beautiful soft, brown that made you feel all safe and warm and fuzzy on the inside, the next minute they were a beautiful, dreamy blue color that could make anyone fall for him in a split second. He was beautiful. Unlike me.

"Maybe you're right, maybe Freya isn't the one." He said laughing under his breath.

I closed my door and grabbed his hand.

"Like you said, you guys have been together six years now. She has been through all of your madness. Through all of the ups and downs of YouTube. Always supporting us. Always cheering you on. Standing by your side at a Millwall game, even though they suck. You guys are meant to be."

Don't get me wrong, that was probably one of the hardest things that I had to do. But I have to support him. He maybe the one I love most, but he is still one of my best friends.

"Thanks Simon, you always know how to cheer me up." He said patting my hand and letting go to open the door.

I opened up my car door and then went inside to pick out his engagement ring.

I started to point out rings and then we both laughed at this one ring making us both laugh as I then rested my head on his shoulder laughing.

"Are you two here to pick out each others weddings ring? You two are very cute together. Reminds me of my wife and I." The lady said as Josh walked away from me as my head fell.

"No, no we aren't together. Just friends. I'm looking for an engagement ring for my girlfriend." He said laughing as I looked down at my hands.

'Just friends' the words you alway dream of hearing from your crush. Right?

"Oh of course." The lady said giving me a questioning look.

I just shrugged it off and followed them to a different counter.

"That one looks nice." I said pointing out to a beautiful ring.

"Wow, you have a good eye." Josh said laughing, "but I don't think Freya would like it."

"Why not?" I asked as he just laughed pointing to a sign.

"Maybe cause these are men rings." He said laughing hysterically making me laugh to.

"Oh, well." I said rubbing the back of my neck as the lady brought us over to the women's rings.

"What do you think of that one?" Josh asked as I looked down and looked back up at him.

His eyes were sparkling with joy. He was so excited for this whole proposal. I felt lost and alone without anyone.

"Yeah, I think she'll like that." I said as he then brought the ring.

We then left the store and decided to get some Nando's.

"Here you get us a table and I'll order our food." Josh said but I shook my head.

"You don't know my order." I said as he shook his head.

"Of course I do. You get the chicken thighs, with your hot sauce and some chips. Then you normally order a water." He said as I just gave him a questionable.

"What you know my order too." He said making me laugh because I knew it was the truth.

"Fine, I'll go get us a seat." I said as I walked over to a table and waited for him.

I then got a text from Freya.

Freya: where is Josh, I've been trying to get in touch with him but he won't answer me.

Simon: he is with me, why?

Freya: I need to talk to him that is all

Simon: well he is ordering our food I'll tell him to text you when he gets back

Every time I talk to her she is always so sweet and it makes me feel bad. I'm so jealous of her, but I know that her and Josh were meant for each other.

"Freya texted you." I said showing him the text as he sat down.

"Thanks." He said taking his phone from his pocket and started to text her.

Why can't he have that goofy smile whenever we talk?