Let Me Be The One

Chapter 27 - Sinner / Saint

Brent

I've been wondering abot Gail for the whole day. She seemed to be busy today. Even on a weekened. I will message her again later.

"Kuya, it's dinner na" katok ni Karina on the door of my room.

"Kuya, hello... earth to kuya..." she waved her hand at my face as I stared blankly at her.

"Oh, Karina, y-yes... on my way down... You go ahead..." I answered habang binababa ang fone ko sa bedside table.

My younger sister can be such a snoop as she walked from the doorway to where I placed my fone on the sidetable and stared. She just literally stared at my fone.

"No message still from that... girl?" iritang sabi ni Karina.

"Her name is Gail. She is your ate Gail, Karina... why do you still insist on calling her that?" I turned as I followed her to the door.

"Kasi, I don't like her Kuya... I don't like that 'girl' " huling sabi niya as she walked out the room.

Karina, the youngest of our family, can be such a brat sometimes. Sometimes, like when we went to the mall a while ago, she was as sweet to me as she always does. And sometimes, especially when Gail visits or is mentioned, Karina becomes very cold and shows how she dislikes her. But I still love my younger sister so much.

Bumaba ako for dinner in a few minutes. When I reached the dining area, Mama and Papa were already there with Karina as the hired helps brought the remaining food to the table.

"Brent, hijo... come and sit down so we can start dinner" Papa said as he saw me walking towards the table.

"Opo, Papa" sagot ko as I sat down to my seat.

"So how was your afternoon with your sister, hijo?" Mama asked as Papa helped her with some of the fried rice on the table.

"It was great, Ma..." I started when Karina spoke.

"... until he became too busy with always checking his fone for a message from that... from... ate... Gail..." Karina said with some pain in trying to sound less disrespectful of Gail in front of our parents.

"Hija... hayaan mo na... alam mo naman ang uya mo..." Papa said before raising his fork and knife to the steak on his plate.

"Anyway, she seems to be a nice girl, hija" Mama added.

I just looked at Karina as she avoided my eyes.

I was about to get some rice for my plate when Karina spoke again, after about a few minutes.

"It's just... nevermind... kuya... can... can you pass the vegetables?" she said as she looked at me.

"S-Sure..." I answered before our usual conversations at the dinner table resumed just like our usual dinners.

I ate my sauteed shrimp and vegetables along with the medium rare steak on my plate as Papa spoke to us.

"By the way... your kuya will be visiting next month" Papa told us with a smile.

"Really? I miss him so much" sabi ni Karina as she took her glass to drink some juice.

Si kuya... matagal tagal din siya di bumibisita. Nasa 1 year na ata. Like Karina, I miss him so much also.

I just smiled and nodded as the family will be complete again. Even for a short time. Maybe I can get Gail to meet kuya finally.

Gail... wonder what she is doing now.

Gail

I couldn't think straight as I set my bag on the table and sat on the sofa. I could feel the tears falling on my warm cheeks as I remembered what Jeannie said.

... behind Brent...

... tell the truth...

... mababa na pala taste mo...

... sa mall...

... you have a boyfriend...

... wasting it all...

... a slut...

... you chose that...

Jeannie's words were swirling in my head. I stood up walked to the kitchen and opened the fridge door and took out the bottle of vodka and took a glass from the cupboard.

"Siguro mababawasan headache ko nito..." sabi ko ng umupo ako sa sofa, my flats scattered sa carpet.

"Para sa mga problema..." buhos ko ng vodka sa baso.

"... at para sa solusyon!" sigaw ko bago ko i-bottoms up ang kalahati ng baso.

I took my phone from my bag after a few minutes. I read again the test of Brent. And the text of Nicolo. At habang patuloy na umiinom ng vodka, I started making a message.

"...my reply to your message" sabi ko pressing 'Send'

Tapos binaba ko ang fone ko sa sofa ng maglakad ako to my room. Undressing as I continued to my bathroom. Opening the shower and stepping into the water. Umupo ako sa floor as the shower water fell on me. Washing my whole self. Washing, hopefully, my guilt.

And somewhere in Manila, the message was received by a phone.

<message received>
I miss you too.
And I love you.