not a dream ; connor franta fanfiction

Chapter 7

*4 weeks later*

So I guess i should catch you guys up.

Me and Jc started dating, and Connor and Elena got pretty serious. Although me and Jc weren't that serious, it was good. But I felt bad because I was just using him to make Connor jealous. But he knew that, so it wasn't that bad.

Connor and Elena were up in his room and me and Jc were downstairs playing the WiiU. We dont really kiss or hold hands when were just by ourselves, because it's awkward...we just hang out like normal friends would do. But whenever Connor is around, I get all gross with him. It's even weird to me.

"Hey guys, were going to go out for a bit. Okay?" Connor yelled before walking downstairs hand in hand with Elena.

I quickly grabbed Jcs hand and kissed him long and passionately.

"Woah sorry to ruin the...make out sesh...." Connor said awkwardly.

"Oh...um so you guys are going out for a bit?" Jc said back.

"Yeah.."

"Kay. Bye." I said trying to get rid of them. They started to walk out the door and just as the door slammed, I jumped off of Jc.

"Sorry."

"It's fine." He said with a sad tone in his voice.

"Jc. What's wrong." I scooted closer to him

"Well, it's just lately I've been feeling used."

I know how he feels. because lately I've been using him. Suddenly I felt HORRIBLE. Who have I become?

Someone who takes advantage of their friends. By fake dating their friend to try to make her other friend jealous because she likes him so much.

"Jc...im sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you like this."

He looked down. "I know."

"Let me make it up to you?" I grabbed his hand and smiled a bit.

He pulled his hand away from mine. "Actually, I'm just gonna go make a video or something in my room." He stood up.

"Maybe I can-" I started.

"Alone!" he shouted from the top of the stairs without turning back.

What the hell is wrong with me?

*2 hours later*

Connor came home. I was sitting on the couch still feeling guilty.

"You sad too?" he said and sat down next to me.

"Why are you sad?" I asked looking at him.

"Just a little stupid fight that me and Elena had. We'll probably get over it tomorrow anyway."

"Oh." I looked away.

"You?"

"Its...nothing." I lied. Jc came downstairs and sat down next to me.

"Taylor...about that thing we talked about earlier...." he started. I looked his way. "I overreacted. Forgive me?" he half-smiled.

I smiled and leaned in to kiss him. He kissed me back and I heard Connor awkwardly walk away.

"Okayyyy then...." He said as he walked away.

"I think you should tell him." Jc whispered to me. "I can't keep faking this." He had a sad tone in his voice. I guess he was right. I couldn't just keep using him.

"Okay." I whispered back. I got up and walked to where Connor was sitting at the table in the kitchen.

"What was that about?" he asked.

"Nothing."

"Nothing? really? then why did you stick your tongue down his throat."

I looked down.

"fine don't answer me." He said angrily.

"You really want to know?" I said more loudly than it was supposed to be. "Because I love him."

"Yeah okay. You were dating for 4 weeks." He scoffed.

"Fine!" I yelled. I saw Jc walk to the kitchen to see us fighting. "The reason me and Jc dated, is because I was jealous of you and Elena. And I wanted you to be jealous!"

"Why would you want me to be jealous?" he yelled back.

"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!" I yelled before storming out the front door slamming it behind me. I started crying. I got in my car and drove far away to a Taco Bell parking lot where I could just sit and cry and think about how much he must think I'm crazy because he doesn't love me back.

Connors POV

"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!" She yelled before storming out the front door and slamming it behind her.

What. Just. Happened. I just stood there and thought. She loves me back?

"She loves me back?" I thought out loud.

"Well what the hell are you doing standing here!" Jc yelled. "Go after her!"

I ran past him out to the driveway. Damn her car was gone. It was too late now. Why do I screw things up so much. Why can't it just be simple and have a happy ending. We fall in love and get married. It's simple!

But it's not that simple.

I walked back into the house. Trying not to cry. "Jc, she's gone."

"Dude, she'll be back. I guarantee it." He reassured me and put a hand on my back. "Trevor and Sam are coming over. We're doing an ask o2l. You can get your mind off things then."

"You're right. It'll get my mind off things." I smiled and walked upstairs to my room trying not to think of her. I couldn't do it. I just couldn't.

Taylor's POV

It was getting pretty late and I got over myself and stopped crying. I looked to the left and saw the sun setting. It was almost 7pm. I sucked it up and started to drive home.

When I got home it was so quiet. Rare, because I live with 4 guys...but then I saw Connor on his laptop in the lounge. He sprung up to hug me.

"Taylor! I was so worried about you..."

"No- I don't want to talk right now." I wiped my eyes and tried to avoid him.

"But I-" he started.

"No Connor I said I didn't want to talk!" I yelled before making my way to the staircase.

But then I heard him say the three words that I've been waiting my whole life to hear come out of his mouth.

I wasn't sure if he really meant it though...I've got too much stuff going on up in my head right now.

"I love you." He said.

I stopped in my tracks. I turned around to face him. I didn't think about it...i just walked up to him and smashed my lips to his. We finally pulled away after about 7 seconds.

"I can't right now." I looked back up to him. "I'm sorry." A tear rolled down my cheek and I ran up the stairs to my room and cried. I wanted to tell someone, but the only person I tell everything to is Connor. I rang Tyler(Oakley) on skype, because I know he'll always listen to my problems.

I told him about me saying I loved him, running away, coming back and having Connor say he loved me back, and the kiss and then now.

"We'll girl go after him!" he said encouragingly.

"Well..i don't know." I hesitated and thought about my dream. If we fall in love like my dream everything will go wrong and ill die!

"Remember that dream I told you about a few days ago?" I asked.

"Yeah. You died because Joey Graceffa is bad at Vlogging and Driving." He joked.

"Yeah, exactly." I laughed. He always knew how to make me laugh. "Well, what if that happens."

"What...die? because you and Connor fell in love?"

"We'll when you say it, it sounds crazier than I thought. But yes!"

"Calm yourself. Just go on tumblr or twitter and get your mind off things...okay?"

"Okay Tyler. Byeeeeeeeee." we ended the skype call. I logged onto twitter and saw Connor tweeted something 2 minutes ago.

@connorfranta: I might've just lost the one thing that was important to me the most. The thing that helps me live another day in my life. The thing I am in love with.

Of course he was trying to send a message to me without it being obvious. A lot of the responses were something like 'internet?' 'your cats?' 'your YouTube account?' but I knew it was to me. It also made me laugh that he refers to me as a 'thing'. Haha.

I logged into tumblr and of course a bunch of funny tumblr blogs reblogged funny things, but then I saw Connors. He reblogged a bunch of sappy love quotes and pictures like people holding hands and kissing. Ugh why can't this be as simple as the movies?

My life is a mess