Forever In My Heart

Chapter 6

 I continue to lie in my bed, having a debate in my head to whether or not if I should see Taevy before I headed back down to Sydney. I was still hurt when she never told me about her heart condition. I can understand if she was scared and how hard it must be to tell me, but she knows she can tell me anything. She knows I will support her through this.

I put our luggage into my car and then headed to the hospital. I grabbed Taevy’s bag and headed inside. I was heading towards her room when I spotted her parents sitting in the kiosk, sipping a coffee and sharing a plateful of potato wedges with sour cream. My stomach grumbled loudly at the smell of food. I walked in there to join them.

“Hi, Mr and Mrs Michael,” I greeted them.

They looked up at me and smiled.

“It’s good to see you again, Liam,” Mrs Michael said. “Why don’t you take a seat?”

I shook my head. “No, it’s okay. I’m going to go soon. I just want to give you Taevy’s luggage before I head back down to Sydney. Um, how’s Taevy?”

“She is okay,” Mr Michael replied. “She is in surgery at the moment.”

“Liam, why don’t you sit down and eat something before you go,” Mrs Michael said. “Lunch will be on Trey and me.”

I didn’t want to stay another moment in this hospital. It’s bad enough that in two months’ time this is where Taevy might be before she passes away. But I agreed to take Mrs Michael’s offer. I sat down beside Mr Michael. I told Mrs Michael what I wanted and she walked off to get my food.

“Liam, I know this whole thing is a shock to you,” Mr Michael said to me once his wife was gone, “but please don’t hate Taevy. She loves you, Liam.”

I suddenly felt a shame for what I did to Taevy. “I know she does. I love her too, but I’m just hurt that she never told me what was going on.”

“I can understand how you feel. Put yourself in her shoes, Liam. If you were diagnosed with a heart condition at a young age, would you find it easy to tell Taevy, especially when you don’t know if the surgery would go well or if you could die any time?”

I took a moment to think about the things he was saying. He was right. If I was diagnosed with any kind of illness I don’t think I would know how to tell Taevy. I would be scared to tell her.

Mrs Michael returned with my potato wedges and Coke. I ate my food quickly and then left the Michaels there. I past a gift shop on the way out and half of me wanted to go in there and get something for Taevy. But I didn’t. I walked out of the hospital and climbed into my car, cranking up Katy Perry on my CD player to keep my mind off Taevy.

I sang along with some of Katy’s songs, but it didn’t feel right singing them without Taevy. It made me feel lonely as I drove home. I kept looking over at the passenger seat beside me, trying to imagine Taevy sitting there. I pictured her smiling face as she sang along with me. Just trying to imagine her brought tears to my eyes and I had to pull over because the tears were starting to blur my vision.

I curled up in the back seat of the car and cried. I wanted Taevy right here so I could hold her. I suddenly felt like I made a huge mistake for leaving Taevy behind. What kind of boyfriend am I? I shouldn’t have left Taevy there. I shouldn’t have told her off for not telling me about my condition. I could turn back, but I have already travelled three hours from the Gold Coast. I didn’t feel like going back right now.

I suddenly had this horrible thought in my head that made me cry harder. I thought what if Taevy didn’t make it through the surgery she was having right now? What if her heart decided to stop right now? I don’t think I can go on or deal with her death right now. I’m not ready for her to die just yet. I don’t want her to die. We’re supposed to be together forever and always… How can it be forever and always?