døg/rabbit~~tysh/jøshler fic

Colorful Night

CastawayJoshler is literally so amazing at writing look at this beaut.

Naturally when someone tells you they love you, you feel overcome with joy and happiness. Don't get me wrong, I do love Josh and he makes me feel like something. He makes me feel like I'm some kind of valued masterpiece.

Like I am The Starry Night and Vincent Van Gogh took his time skillfully creating my every feature. He made me feel some type of beauty about myself, he made me feel alive when the world was dark and poisonous.

He made me feel so loved, but he also made me feel like a monster. It's sad really. I'm scared to love him in fear of hurting him. I'm psychotic and dangerous. I can't ruin Josh, he's the actual work of art.

Though I'm dark colors with touches of bright colors to draw attention to me, Josh is nothing but bright warm colors.

He reminds me of Colorful Night by Leonid Afremov. Nothing but bright, warm colors that catches your attention and makes you keep your gaze on it. He isn't appreciated enough either, just like said painting.

"Tyler, did you even hear me?"

I snap my head up to lock my eyes with Josh's as he enters the room with two light blue pills in his hand. I raise my eyebrows and give him a look.

He chuckles as he sits beside of me, "Chill, it's Aleve for your headache I know you're going to get." He says handing me the pills.

I smile as I take the pills and lay them on my bedside table, "you're a blessing you know that?"

He smiles and there's more color in that one smile than could ever be expressed. He alone is a masterpiece not yet known to man. He's a sacred item I want to keep to myself.

"I love you," he says leaning in to give me a soft kiss and I cup his face pulling him closer.

"I love you too, and I'll never get tired of saying it," I mumble against his lips as we both smile. To see the look in his eyes when I say those three little words is enough to keep my demons at bay for the time being.

"I love your stubble," I say casually stroking his chin with my index finger and smiling. He closes his eyes and smiles,  he looks like he's being enveloped in complete bliss. The sight makes my heart skip a beat as I lean in and press a soft kiss to his clavicle and up to his throat.

His stubble rubbing against my face as I continue to shower him in innocent kisses. He hums and I feel the vibration, causing me to let out a hum of satisfaction, "you're so perfect."

He smiles as he kisses me properly, "far from it. The closest to perfect I can get is you, and that's pretty close."

I blush as I lean down to hide my face into his chest, "stop, I'm not used to cute comments." I'm smiling like a fool as I hold him close and breathe in his scent.

He gingerly pulls me back as he locks his eyes with mine,"babyboy, I'll make you believe you are lovely." My heart melted.

"That's the sweetest thing anyone could ever say to me. The fact that you think I'm lovely, and willing to try and make me see it. I'm just a mess. I'm a chaotic mess that appears beautiful, but I'm far from it. What really lies beneath is dangerous and toxic." I let the words tumble out of my mouth as I start panting and tears form in my eyes.

Josh's arms encircle me as he pulls me back against my bed and holds me close, "I never said it'd be easy, but Tyler I'll show you just how lovely you are," he says kissing my temple.

I bury my face into his neck as the tears flow freely, "you can't fix me Josh, I'm too broken. I'm like a broken car window. Once I'm shattered you have to completely replace me in order to fix me. I'm unfixable."