Never Alone (Anime(Kpop) x reader) REQUESTS OPEN

Kai X Self-harm!Reader

  TRIGGER WARNING
You have been warned. If you can not stomach such things, DO NOT READ THEM!
And to the rest of you, welcome to my first one shot collection. It was requested by:

I hope I don't disappoint any of you. If you have any comments, requests or FRIENDLY advice, feel free to leave them in the comment section or on my profile. I will try to take everything into consideration. Thank you!
Now, on with the story.

Kai X Self-harm!Reader

Your POV:
It has been two months since I was told the horrible news. That Jongin....died.
The other EXO members came to my doorstep one day and told me that his car had crashed and blew up. They couldn't find his body, but there was practically nothing left of the car....I still can't believe that he is gone. I love him so much, that the news broke me. I can't stand living anymore. He is gone. The day of the accident he told me that he had something important he wanted to ask me, but he never returned. I don't want to live. I would have killed myself, maybe, but I am too much of a coward. I cut. The pain on my skin distracts me a bit from the pain I feel in my heart.

You are sitting on the bathroom floor, stomach covered in cuts and scars, blood all over the floor and your clothes as well. You start to feel a bit faint. Whether it's from the blood loss or simply from the process itself you don't know and don't care. It is a sign that you need to stop. You clean up, change and put away your razors. You trudge into the living room and plop yourself down onto the couch. You aimlessly browse through the different channels, but nothing catches your interest. You lift yourself off of the couch and decide that an evening walk will help you clear your head. But the minute you get to the door, all of your energy disappears and you slump to the door. You close your eyes and lean your head on the corridor wall.
*Ring* *Ring*
Someone rings the doorbell, but you don't have the strength or desire to answer. So you simply sit there, listening to the ringing that resonates through the house. Suddenly it stops and you hear the door being unlocked with a key. When you realize this and open your eyes, you are met with the worried gaze of no other than.....Jongin.
No! NO! Jongin is dead! What is going on?! Am I dreaming?
With terrified eyes and tears slipping down your cheeks you stumble into your bedroom and climb under the covers, covering your ears.
You hear him coming closer to your bed and your whole body starts to violently shake. He sits on the bed and sighs. He removes the blanket from over your head. You close your eyes shut. He begins to gently stoke your hair. His warmth, his touch seems so familiar and you slowly lift your eyes to meet his gaze. He looks at you with a hurt and worried expression. He opens his arms, inviting you into his embrace. You slowly and carefully come closer and closer to him. He keeps his arms open, waiting for you. When you finally wrap your arms around his neck, he locks you in a firm and warm hug and you start to cry even harder, clinging on to his shirt. He pats your back, whispering sweet nothings into your ear and lightly rocking you back and forth. You lift your head off his shoulder and look at his face. He smiles at you and gently wipes away your tears. He is just the way you remember him, his eyes, his smile, his scent, his touch. You want to believe that he is alive, but something in the back of your head keeps whispering that you are dreaming, hallucinating or imagining the whole situation. He looks into your eyes and brings your face closer. You close your eyes and feel him sweetly kiss you on the lips. You don't want to deny it anymore. You have to ask.
"H-How a-are you h-here? Because y-you-"
"-died? I know, that is what everyone thought. I got out of the car just in time. I was hurt, but I survived. I fell into a coma and was taken care of in the village near the place that the car exploded. This may be hard to believe, but almost everyone there are foreigners, so I guess Kpop is not something they are familiar with, or more like they don't know who Kai from EXO is. When I came to, in a few days they said I could go home. I tried calling you, but you would not pick up the phone. I asked the others too, but they said they had not heard from you since you found out I was gone. I missed you so much. I was worried something had happened to you."
You start to cry, but this time from happiness. The pain that burns your skin is telling you that this was no dream, Jongin was back and he had you in his arms at this very minute. When you realize the situation, you latch onto his neck, sending the two of you backwards onto your bed. He laughs and kisses your forehead. He rolls you over, so that the two of you are lying on you sides. You don't feel his hand on your side, until he accidentally brushes over one of your fresh cuts and you wince. He feels the strange sensation of cut skin under his fingertips and slowly starts to lift your shirt. You realize that you can't hide it, so you simply hide your face in your hands.
You don't see his reaction, because you are silently crying into your hands. He lowers your shirt and possessively brings you into his embrace. You can't see his face, because he hid your face in his chest. You can feel him shaking and soft sniffing can be heard.
"I am so sorry, (Name), so sorry. It is all my fault."
"D-Don't cry, O-Oppa. I-I was weak. Please, don't cry."
"You are not a weak person, (Name). If I found out that you had died, I wouldn't be able to live on. I am happy, that you could hold on till I came back, but you need to stop this."
You can feel his hand slowly go under your shirt once again and gently touch the cuts and scars. You wince slightly, but he simply kisses you lips gently and keeps on soothingly touching your stomach.
"Do you promise to stop this? I don't want to see any more scars on your beautiful skin, I don't want you to hurt yourself over me. I care about you too much."
"I promise."
A few moments pass in complete silence.
"Oppa?"
"Yes?"
"What did you want tell me before? You told me I would find out at home."
"Oh! Right! Close your eyes, (Name)."
You close your eyes and feel him lift your hand. Something cold gets slipped onto your finger.
You open your eyes and see a simple silver ring with his initials engraved on it. A matching ring is on his finger, with your initials on it. You look at him through your tears with questioning look.
"It's a promise ring. It was supposed to be an anniversary present, but I wasn't able to give it to you back then. So, this is a late present. Will you accept it, (Name)?"
"Of course, Jongin-oppa. Thank you."
The tears won't stop flowing down your cheeks, but these are tears of happiness.
"Aigoo, you know I can't stand to see my beautiful girlfriend shed so many tears. Don't cry, (Name)."
He kisses your cheeks until the tears dry and all that can be heard and your giggles.
He lovingly looks into your eyes and smiles. He hugs you close and sighs contently.
"You know I love you, (Name)."
"I know, Oppa, I love you too."