Break (A Kylo Ren Fanfic)

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The man with the chilling eyes walks in the room, closing the door slowly behind him before looking up. Our eyes meet and as he makes his way across the room towards the desk, our eyes never once part.

Finally he makes it to his large chair and takes a seat, his eyes still remaining locked on mine.

At first I believe I should hold my ground and show him I'm not afraid, but then I look away, remembering that I must show fear and submission. I bow my head, letting a slight tremble pass through my body.

The tremble was completely legitimate.

This man actually scares me and if I let myself return to my old attitude, I can find myself in the exact mindset I need to be to convince this man of who I am.

"Would you like anything to drink?" He asks me slowly, in his soft but firm voice.

I shake my head slowly, replying. "No." I look up to him and see his skeptical eyes. "No, s-sir."

I keep eye contact for only a few seconds before looking away again.

"Well then I guess we should just cut to the chase," the man says in a strong voice. I flicker my eyes to him in fear.

I nod my head as a symbol of submission, waiting for him to nail me with questions.

A few seconds pass by in silence. Those seconds feel like minutes to me.

"So, how did the first order capture you?"

"Do not forget my words, Lyra," Kylo says to me, instructing me on my backstory.

"Kylo, I won't," I say, slightly annoyed with his lack of confidence in me.

I watch as he rolls his eyes before stepping closer to me. "You cannot fail this mission. One slip in your backstory could mean your death."

"I know. I can handle it."

He looks at me in such a serious manner for a while. I can read his emotions, which is incredibly unusual for him but I take the opportunity. I see worry, a little anger, and something else I can't exactly put a finger on. It looks like affection but I know better than that.

"Kylo, I promise, I won't forget." I reach up to his face which is incredibly close to mine, caressing his cheek with my fingers.

I wrap my fingers around the back of his neck, my thumb coming to rest just before his ear. A small smile forms on his face before he leans closer to me and—

I shake the memory from my head, trying to remember exactly what the story is. Thinking about him like that...it distracts me for a moment.

When I realize that my façade could potentially be falling, I look up and reform my composure.

"I-I..." I start shaking, as my fake memory comes to my mind. I continue to act just as I should. "His...troopers. They invaded my palace at night. I think they were looking for something... I was a servant and I saw a trooper...he was," I choke on my words, hiccuping as more tears start to flow. "He was hurting a child and I couldn't watch it. When I tried to stop him...h-he," I stutter, stopping before I lay my head in my hands and start sobbing.

"He knocked me out and took me back to–to...him," I say, making a louder sob.

I sniffle, controlling my emotions and bringing my hands from my face. When I see his cool eyes studying me, I look away and wipe the tears from my face. "I'm s-sorry."

"Here," he says, handing me a cloth. I gratefully take it and wipe away my tears.

While I do this I do a mental happy dance because he just showed a little bit of compassion, which means I could possibly have a foot in the door.

"Take your time, but what happened after that?" He asks. I look up to see him leaning back in his chair.

"Sorry I shouldn't be crying this much..." I leave a pause to let him think I'm regaining my composure. I feel a little bit of actual fear for this man but I try not to let that affect my performance.

"I was held in this...cell. Strapped down. I was there forever before—" I stop, looking at the man dead in his eyes. "He came."

I start shaking, reaching up to push my hair out of my eyes, making it obvious that I'm trembling.

I start crying again, looking around the room frantically.

"I thought he was going to kill me. He had his saber out and–and..." I trail off, shuddering from my fake memory.

I place my hands down on the table between me and this leader, acting as though I'm pressing down hard to stop my trembling. I leave my eyes on my hands, watching as they go from trembling to forcedly still.

Suddenly, I feel another hand on mine as I see the man's hand cover mine.

"That's okay, Lyra. We are done for now. I will send Argon to retrieve you shortly." Without anything more, the man stands and leaves the room.

I'm left to myself to wonder if I succeeded at all today or if he's sending Argon to take me to my demise.

He seemed as though he was lending compassion when he touched my hands, but for all I know he could be acting like me. He could want me to believe that I'm trusted so I'll falter in some way.

That will not be happening.

As I sit there by myself, I start thinking of how well I must do to not fail.

And I start crying.

Not only for just the act. Yes it will look good for me if I'm broken down in tears when Argon comes to get me, but I also do it because I'm scared.

All of my fears are catching up to me no matter how hard I tried to push them down and away before.

I'm terrified of the uncertainty of my future, but it gives me the motivation I need to do my best.

I keep crying, bringing my hands to my face and letting tremors take over my body.

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So for some reason this for published but it wasn't supposed to be. Don't know how it happened but I'm sorry for the confusion! Here is the full chapter :)

Sorry for the delay I have had a cray cray summer and I hope to get back to normal writing soon Bc I miss it a lot!

xx