O N G O I N G
Trigger Warnning: suicidal ideation, anxiety attack, depressive episodes, psychotic episodes, hallucinations, sexual abuse content, eating disorder
Please read at your own risk.
Cover by: Penscanwrite
RIGHT after I finished fixing myself, I went downstairs already diretso sa dining area. I saw my mom and dad eating quietly. As in tahimik, their spoon and forks also create no noise.
I cleared my throat to call their attention in which I succeed. Nilingon nila ko at halatang natigilan sila pareho.
"B-Bakit po?" buong pagtatakang tanong ko upon seeing their reaction.
"What's with the hair?" tanong ni Mommy.
Awtomatiko akong napahawak sa buhok ko. I clipped kasi the small amount of my hair. "Ah, wala po. Humahaba na po kasi bangs ko kaya nahaharangan na mukha ko. Do I...look horrible po ba?"
"Of course not!" they both said in chorus. They looked at each other and looked back again at their own food. Sobrang awkward nila sa isa't-isa.
"Join us here," utos ni Daddy.
"Uhmmm...Ano po kasi. I have to go na po."
Napatingin ulit sila sa'kin.
"You're not going to eat your breakfast?" Mommy asked. "Baka manghina ka niyan sa school. Breakfast is an important meal and I know you know that."
"M-May usapan po k-kasi kami ng mga friends ko that we'll eat breakfast together. O-Okay lang po ba?" Droplets of sweat started to form in my forehead. Lying isn't my profession.
"Ask your mom," sagot ni Daddy at saka kumain ulit.
"O-Okay lang po ba, Mommy?"
Tinignan niya ko with an empty stare. "If you're telling the truth then you can go now. But if you're lying stay here and eat with us."
Kinokonsensya ko ni Mommy alam ko 'yun. Hindi talaga ko sanay magsinungaling pero bahala na. Minsan lang naman.
"S-Sige po. Una na po ako. Ingat po kayo." Tumalikod na ko at naglakad palayo. I did not bother to look back dahil nakaka-guilty.
Sorry Mommy and Daddy.
Nang nakasakay na ko sa kotse ko ay saka ako nakahinga ng malalim. I drove muna palabas ng subdivision namin saka tinext si Azriel.
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Syemay. Nag-double send. Baka sabihin naman nito excited na excited talaga ko!
He replied after two minutes.
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