When I'm Gone ( Nate Maloley AU)

Aftertaste: Chapter Sixteen

Hayden's POV:

I hated this. I try to convince Brandon to untie me, and it's been forever. Marco has starved me, and I know Jude is trying to help. I'm too weak to fight back, I just wish it was over, hoping that maybe I'll die instead of sitting here sick. I knew nothing would change the fact that I've become captive to a pimp and nothing would save me, or take me away unless I got out of here and moved away.

I was petrified.

Maybe, what made it worse, was the face that Marco came in every night to try to have his way with me. I fought against him every time, only to get beat in the process. I was broken down, and the anxiety and feeling of abandonment came with it.

"Hayden?"

I look up, expecting to see Brandon, but I see Jude. If anything, I expected him to leave me. He only picked me up. His strong arms gave me security.

"I just want to go home," I whisper, "Please."

•••

They didn't take me home. After I changed into a sweat shirt and jeans, I was taken to a hospital. He'd find me like he always does. I lay attached to an IV, with Jude holding my hand.

"I'm here to see Hayden-"

"Sir, I can't let you do that right now. She is not in the correct mental state."

I hear Nate's concern. Jude stands and walks out to bring Nate in to see me. They thought I was asleep. We don't say a word to each other and I can't find the words to express to him how sorry I am for ruining his life.

"Nate, I think it's time to send her home."

"W-"

"She needs to go home. She needs to get away from this, and she needs a life that doesn't involve our drama."

"Sam won't let her go."

"I know. We have no choice but to send her to another hospital. With what they've done to her, she-"

"Wants to die?"

Jude nods, but I look at them.

"I don't want to die," I whisper, "I want to sleep until this anxiety goes away."

"I'll tell them," Jude says softly.

"Hayden-"

"Don't say your sorry. This was never your fault," I finally confess with the drugs filling my body, "I never hated you. I hated myself and I pushed you away and blamed you because it was easier than to face the truth."

"Hayden, I'm leaving on a tour with Sam. When we come back, I'll make sure never to see you."

I watch as he leaves.

"Nate!"

Jude looks at me. They allow me to go, and we leave back to my house.