Ella is, well she's a 20 year old virgin. Is she proud of that fact? Not really. For a good girl like she is, she wanted her first time to be with someone who knows what he's doing, no strings attached. You didn't expect that turn, huh? When Ella me...
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k, byee
-Ivy xx
**
I drunkenly stumble up the stairs that seem so steeply to walk on, which only made me feel more drunk than I already am. Currently, I am in the state of drunk where I know what I'm doing, in fact I am completely aware of it, but I just don't care. This is the only time when I feel like I can do whatever. It's probably just me, but I know myself. And I am just a few cups away from being totally wasted which is not something I want to be. I'm perfectly okay with this state I am in right now. I should stop thinking about that.
My heart is beating so fast and so hard inside of my chest, just wanting to escape from it's position from all the excitement I'm feeling right now. I can't believe I'm actually doing this. Me, Adelaide Clark, a girl who's parents own a small shop, a girl who was teacher's favourite, the one in who everybody put faith in, that girl wants to give her virginity to a man she doesn't even know, who is apparently known as teh fucker which sound ridiculous by the way. But, does it feel good? Yes, it does.
Never have I ever in my life done something without thinking about it, without trying to find different solutions and without any fear of consequences. It feels amazing finally doing something so exciting and ruthless. There so many things that can go wrong. He could say no and laugh at me, or worse, he might say yes and then record us having sex. All in one, there is just too many things that could go wrong. But, I like this state of not caring about all the things that could go wrong.
A satisfied smile that appears on my face when I finally reach the end of the stairs, gets replaced with a frown when I see way to many doors for a house to have. I lean my back against the wall to get some rest, I mean, it was a long and uneasy journey from the kitchen to this hall that makes me even more nauseous than I already am. Well, this feeling is just a reminder I shouldn't even drink at the first place.
For some odd reason, stumbling through the large hall with white walls that make everybody feel like they've just come in a hospital, makes me feel bad, it's kind of scary and satisfying. I wonder what would my parents say if they found out their precious daughter got drunk and is about to give her virginity to a complete stranger who makes her horny. i should stop thinking about my parents, why am I even thinking about them in the first place?
I shake my head at my thoughts, pushing faces of my mum and dad at the back of my mind. The somehow still sane part of my mind keeps on scolding me and reminding me how wrong this is, but when I think about it, I realise how perfect this is. From what I hear, Harry isn't a type of a guy to be in a relationship and especially have feelings for another person. Which is good because after he leaves, and that's in three or two days, if I remember correct, I won't see him again. He'll forget about me and I'll find someone to start a serious relationship with and I let that person make love to me again and again.
