the deal ~ h.s. (au)

41. The Edge

I stare at Harry who's smirking at me as he peacefully drinks his beer, fully knowing how unprepared he has caught me. I could not be more flattered by hi wanting me to accompany him to his father's wedding, but despite the still rapid and hard beating of my heart, he should've expected me to have some plans. And he obviously knew about Luca - what would he'd done if I had told him before that Luca and I were serious? Maybe that was the reason why he asked me that in the first place. 

As my mind still races, hopelessly trying to catch my thoughts who have escaped due to the alcohol that has slowly started showing its effect on me, Harry sighs "I should have asked you before, but I knew you still didn't have a life and yet alone plans for the weekend," he comments, smirking proudly and I gasp, giving him a glare I hope could have the ability to burn. 

"Still the same old rude," I reply before I take another sip of my drink, enjoying the taste of beer more than I probably should. 

"Still the same old prude," he says back and I happily gasp which surprises him, but he only chuckles at me and that only widens my already wide smile.

"Rhyme!" I say, louder than I wanted, and give out my hand to him in a low attempt for a high five. He high fives me and chuckles again, causing me to laugh along. Most of the time we have spent together before was usually made with moments off us down each other's throats with our tongues or with moments like this. It took me a while to realise throwing insults is his abnormal form of humour, and some things he says can be hurtful, but I don't think he has ever truly meant them. Or at least I hope he doesn't. 

"How foggy is it in your head right now?" he asks, smiling at me and I ignore my melting heart as I smile back at him.  

"Just a little bit," I respond quietly while showing him how little with my thumb and index finger. He covers his mouth with his hand as he laughs, shaking his head slightly and I can't help myself but laugh. 

There isn't a world in which I wouldn't find him so absolutely adorable, yet attractive as I do right now. I keep my eyes on him as he still chuckles to himself before he runs his hand through his hair, which I've noticed is shorter now. His presence throws me in a bubble of joy and gives me this trembling, warm feeling inside of me, setting small flames which are later going to erupt into the most dangerous fires if I'm not careful enough. If I manage to keep my distance from all the previous memories and feelings, along with this loving feeling I have right now and always seem to connect to him. As sad as it might sound, he was and apparently still is the only person who has made me feel it. 

After laughing for a while more, exchanging a few jokes between each other,  we've decided to go home because it was starting to get late and I am terrified of what my body would do if I had one more drink in front of him. I can barely control myself and keep myself steady around him without alcohol - I don't want to know what would happen if the alcohol ruled over. 

"There you go, White," he informs me as he pulls in front of my building and lowers the music for a little bit. I turn my head to look at him just a second before he looks at me and suddenly, a familiar silence settles between us. 

It's mesmerising to me how wonderful he looks right now as the soft moonlight falls on his face, creating a beautiful dark and light contrast. I observe his features, now more freely because the alcohol has taken a small part of shyness and embarrassment away. I know he's doing the same thing because I manage to catch a glimpse of him scanning my face and usually I would be uncomfortable by that, but right now I'm not. Despite knowing I'm not looking my best right now, the comfortable silence creates a safe place for me. 

Slowly, a sudden tension appears between us and my heartbeat fastens along with my breathing as I realise a terrifying thought - I would give anything right now to press my lips against his. I would live with every amount of quilt inside, just for one taste of his kiss, for once perfect sync of our lips. Despite of every valid reason reminding me of how wrong it would be, I find myself in complete ignorance as the only thing I want is him.